You're acting like a Child

Conversations with Ivy

2012-01-09T15:10:00.000-08:00

Ivy: "Mom, ya know how Buggy is in Girl Scouts?"

Me: "Yeah."

Ivy: "Well, I don't think she's gonna be very good at it, because she's not friendly, and she's not helpful, and she's not courageous, and she's not strong, and she's not considerate and she's not caring.

"What does considerate mean again?"

Yep, I am definitely going to miss these kids when they grow up!

Best Moments of my Life

2011-12-28T14:54:00.000-08:00

Ahhh, so much to say, so little time!

December was a blur, of course, because that's just how life is when you have little kids.

Especially when you want them to stay little forever!

I know, I complain all the time about how exhausting child-rearing is. It must seem like I can't wait for them to grow up and become more self-sufficient, and to do their own laundry and to run their own errands!

And it IS true that I am always so proud and excited with each step and milestone that they take in their little lives. I love watching them grow!

But at the same time, I'd give anything to be able to hit the "pause" button.

Will I always be ambivalent that way?

Will it always be so exciting and gratifying to see them growing into themselves, and becoming their own people, and achieving their own goals; yet be equally sad to know that they are so quickly growing up and away from me, and out into the world?

I just don't want their childhoods to go this fast.

I really want to be able to hit the pause button!

Sometimes,

they are so cute, and I feel so lucky,

that I'm convinced life will never be this good again. I'll never feel this content, and this blessed, and this happy ever again. I want to stop time from marching forward, because this is it! These are the best moments of my life!

I want to be more rested, and more patient, and more present! I want more money, and more time, and more freedom!

I want to enjoy every minute, because I know that it will never come again!

Sometimes,

in the middle of all our running around,

it hits me!

Olivia is almost out of the Kinder gymnastics classes,

and Ivy is already in her third year of Girl Scouts!

She won't have many more Christmases- if any- of believing in Santa,

and Olivia finally is taking a few timid steps away from me...

Some days, the realization that they are growing up is genuinely painful for me.

Which is just so crazy!

I've been wishing for alone-time, and freedom, and escape, for quite a few years now. Being a mom has felt downright suffocating at times!

The thing is, I realize that alone-time, and freedom are inevitable.

They will grow up!

And the crazy part is, the thought of my kids being gone is

flat

out

heart-breaking.

I will miss the chaos!

I will miss Daisies!

I will miss the Kindergarten performances,
and I'll miss Buggy's sassy smirks!

I'll miss working in classrooms,
and I'll miss knowing that they are safe and protected from the world.
I'll miss the dance recitals,
and I'll even miss the rehearsals.I'll miss those moments of watching them shine,and seeing their pride,and feeling my own.I'll miss yelling at Jon to stop ruining all of our pictures,and I'll feel bad that I didn't let them make more messes.I'll miss the My Little Pony memory game, and I'll wish that I'd played it with Buggy every time she had asked.I'll miss falling into my bed exhausted but excited on Christmas Eve, eagerly anticipating their excitement and happiness,but at least Jon will probably still be playing video games on Christmas Day, even when we're 80!I'll miss it all; the toys, the laundry, the fighting, the messes, the broken things, and even the sleep deprivation. Because I know in my heart, that these really are the best moments of my life.

And I know that I am a very lucky person.

The Frenzy of Fall

2011-12-01T21:31:00.000-08:00

AHHHHHHHH! I haven't blogged since Halloween, and now the entire month of November is gone! I hate it when I am this far behind!

Behind on what? I know, it's a little ridiculous that I am obsessed with documenting every minute detail of my life on a blog.

I don't exactly know where the urge comes from; maybe there are a whole bunch of reasons!

It's gotta be a strange mix of losing my mom too early, wanting to believe that the story of my life will matter to someone, somewhere, and feeling the tug of that "Mormon-Woman duty" that runs through my veins! Surely, if my ancestors could cart what few remaining possessions they had- all the way across the country on foot- in the name of religious freedom, I can type out a few lines to "keep a true and faithful record in all things" about my relatively comfy life today.

Except, my life record seems to be leaning toward the "old people are cynical for a reason" side, especially when I write the "truth"... and who wants to read that?

I'll just get right to today's topic: November!

And the truth about November is this: life is busy and hectic and stressful and chaotic, but deep down, I am a very content person.

Gage got up on Thanksgiving and asked me what I'm thankful for, and I instantly answered, "YOU! I'm thankful for YOU, Gage!"

He smiled, and said, "You always say that. What else are you thankful for?"

Geez, kid, what am I NOT thankful for?

I spend way too much time complaining about the drudgery of life, and not nearly enough on the joys. I think it's because I didn't know before marriage-and-kids that life is 90% work, and 10% fun! I wasn't prepared for the sheer amount of WORK that being an adult/parent requires. I sorta thought that if I made it out of college alive, it would be all smooth sailing from there.

It's kinda been stormy at times, though. And strange as it may be, I'm growing to appreciate it.

Even though I complain about the laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, classroom-working, taxi-cabbing, and home-working almost constantly, I wouldn't change A THING!

Well, I'd change a few things about how I have over-committed myself, but I'm presently in the process of fixing that.

And anyway, the point is, life is chaotic and crazy and busy, but that's also what makes the perfect moments so completely perfect.

Like this one,

and this one,

and this one,

and this one!

When we're not mired in all the "duties" of life, but just enjoying living, I'm really quite happy! The kids are completely adorable, and being together without a care in the world makes all the rest of it so totally worth it.

Nope, November was not without drama. In fact, November had quite a bit of drama, but ya know what? It made me sit down, take an honest, long look at how I spend my time, and then decide what was worth keeping, and what had to go.

Having Thanksgiving roll around right smack in the middle of it only served to reinforce my decision that life is too short to spend my energies on things that drain me, and that distract me from the big picture.

Yep, that would be the one! Their little childhoods are RACING by, and I don't want to miss a minute of it!

November, for me, was about being thankful for the things in life that really matter. And I do, indeed, have much to be thankful for.

But enough with the sappy stuff; back to my update!

I last left off with Halloween, which was actually quite the production this year! Halloween was on a Monday, and we spent the entire week-end celebrating!

We attended a Harvest Festival with friends on Friday,

a trunk-r-treat on Saturday,

and then a Halloween Party on Saturday night!

On Sunday night, we carved jack-o-lanterns in preparation for the following day,And then Monday morning meant dressing up in costumes, again!

Gage went to school as Darth Vader, Olivia was a devil (not much of a stretch there),

and Ivy was a candy-corn witch!
Jon stuffed himself into the truck, and we waltzed into the kids' school all dressed up
like lunatics.
How would you feel if your parents showed up at school looking like that?

Well, it turns out we weren't the only whack-jobs. Jon had lots of Halloween-lover company!

Finally, the sun went down, and the main event began! We trick-or-treated around the neighborhood with Ivy's friend Manon, and her mom, Takako.

I can tell you that by Monday night, I was done with Halloween. It felt great to wash the costumes, and pack them away in a tote on Tuesday afternoon!

On Thursday, November 3, Olivia attended her very first Daisy girl scout meeting,

and it didn't go well. We had arrived 10 minutes late, and as soon as the "circle time" arrived at Olivia, she wouldn't say her name or whose class she was in, she just burst into tears instead.

Are you kidding me?

We left the meeting early, and I had pretty much decided she would only get one more chance, and that was it. Life is WAY TOO SHORT to force her to go to Daisies! If she doesn't want to do girl scouts, that is JUST FINE with me!

The following week was Jon's birthday, and as the ski resort had opened just a few days earlier on November 6th, he decided that's how we should celebrate!

I was definitely reluctant at first. Come on, who wants to ski pre-season? The snow is crappy, and I knew that if Jon scraped his board on a rock, I'd be hearing about it for the rest of our Earthly lives.

Turns out I was worried for nothing. The lines were practically non-existent, the weather was spectacular, and we ended up having a really great time!

Grandpa had watched the kids for us all day, and after long, hot showers, we were able to gather the fam together before bed to have a little apple pie, ice-cream, and presents before tuck-in!

Jon said it was the best birthday he'd had in a LONG time!

The rest of November seriously flew by; the kids had "early out" days during the week of Nov. 14 - 18th for parent/teacher conferences, which meant they were only in school from 8:00 to 11:00. We had a bunch of play-dates that week,

and Olivia attended her second Daisy meeting that week as well.

I had explained to her that I really didn't care if she joined Daisies or not, so if she didn't like it this time, we were quitting. I hadn't even sewn her patches on yet, because I was all set to take everything back to the girl scout store! There is no way I'm dragging that chick to something she doesn't want to do.

Apparently, she knew I was serious, 'cause she was all smiles that day!

I guess we're staying in Daisies for awhile...

On Friday the 18th, Olivia's little class had a "Thanksgiving Feast," and I have to say, it was pretty darn cute!

They sang some sweet little songs for us, and then all the Kindergartners sat down for a meal together... it was SUPER CUTE!

Then, on Saturday, November 19th, HALLELUJAH!

Soccer ended!

Ivy was thrilled to receive her little trophy at the end-of-the year party, and oh my goodness! I can't tell you how happy I was to know that I had my Saturday mornings back for sleeping in until 9:00!

YAY!

We spent the following week off from school cleaning the house, and pulling out Christmas decorations. Jon had to work on Thanksgiving, so we ate turkey late that night, with my dad and Judi, my good friend Julie, and also our friend Elizabeth and her three boys, who happen to be the exact same ages as my kids.

Gage was pretty excited, as they all parked themselves in front of the X-box for a holiday video-game-fest. We don't usually have other kids around on holidays, as all the cousins live far away, so it was fun to have a house full of kids that evening.

And, instead of joining the throngs of crazed shoppers on Black Friday, we loaded up the car, and headed to Santa Cruz for the week-end!

We had taken a vacation to Santa Cruz during the same week-end in 2009, and had so much fun that we decided to do it again this year.

"Surfin' Santa" rides into Capitola Beach on the Saturday after Thanksgiving each year, so that's where we headed!

We arrived at the beach around 10 in the morning, and chased waves,
played frisbee,

and played in the water until Santa washed ashore at Noon.

Sure enough, we spotted Santa on the horizon just before Noon, and the kids had a front-beach spot to watch him land!

Apparently, Santa surfed in at one time, but during the two years that we have been there, he cheated and rode in on a skiff!

The kids didn't seem to notice or care; they were so excited to see him come ashore, and even though Gage has known for a couple of years now that I am Santa, he was caught up in the Surfin' Santa excitement with everyone else!

It was pretty fun!
We waited in a hideously long line (though not as long as in 2009), and I was so relieved when Olivia actually sat on Santa's lap, and told him she wanted a "Toodle Bear." I don't think Santa had a clue what she was talking about (especially since it's a "Doodle Bear") but he sure played along!
I asked Santa if we could pose for a quick family shot, and whata-ya-know! There's my back-up Christmas picture this year if I can't get them all to pose for a better one!

After Surfin' Santa, we had turkey sandwiches for lunch, and then made our way to the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk.

The kids went on ONE ride (that's all their mean-mom would allow),and then we played on the beach until dinner time. We ate a SUPER YUMMY dinner at a chinese restaurant we'd been directed to by our GPS (what a score) and then headed back to Judi's friend's cabin for the rest of the evening.

We played Yahtzee and Taboo with the kids until bedtime, and then awoke the next morning for another fun-filled day in Santa Cruz.

We spent the morning at Neary Marsh, played at a park, stopped at Costco for a quick, inexpensive lunch, and then spent the rest of the day on the beach!

Gage and Jon built a sand castle,

Ivy built a "sand man," and Buggy built a mess.

All in all, it had been another fun-filled vacation at the beach, and none of us wanted to go home.

We arrived back in town at 9:00 on Sunday night, and sent the kids straight up to the showers!

Monday morning brought school for the kids, work for Jon, and working in Gage's classroom for me. I'd hardly settled back into the weekly routine, when Olivia started vomiting on Wednesday night! This ENTIRE WEEK has been a blur; I am only just now finishing up the laundry from our week-end getaway, as "puke" laundry takes precedence over sand laundry...

SIGH...

I now find myself only three and a half weeks away from Christmas, and completely in shock that another December is already upon us! I don't feel ready AT ALL. So I figured I'd waste a day on the computer instead of attempting to get organized!

Things just never seem to slow down around here- they really don't- but it's all good.

Life is definitely good! And I'm sure that December will bring just as much fun and excitement and BUSY-NESS as November...

Welcome Winter!

Over-extended

2011-11-16T04:21:00.000-08:00

Today was one of those days where I thought I was sailing along smoothly, and then seemingly out of nowhere, I was hit by what felt like a surprise attack! It completely took all the wind out of my sails, instantly, and I was left trying to figure out what had happened, why it had happened, and what I should do about it.

It's been quite upsetting!

Basically, while I felt like I was complaining about being over-extended and stretched too thin, I inadvertently offended a very good friend who interpreted my comments as some sort of passive-aggressive attempt at getting out of doing something that I had previously agreed to do.

It was upsetting for many reasons, not the least of which is my frustration at being accused of passive-aggression.

Most people who know me well enough to be in my "friend" category know that I am not the type to send out subtle hints, and hope that some ulterior meaning is decoded and subsequently acted upon.

I most definitely do not have time to scheme up such manipulations.

I don't have time for much of anything, actually, which seems to be the root of my current problem.

At any rate, I complain a lot- especially to my friends- when life feels overwhelmingly busy and I am consumed with "Mom guilt" when I am unable to meet the many demands that I feel are placed upon me. I've enjoyed a life-long career of people-pleasing, and I never handle it well when people are displeased. It feels like some sort of personal and moral failure.

So here I am, feeling defensive and confused and hurt and misunderstood. I took a sleep-aid and drifted off to sleep between 11 and Midnight, only to wake up at 3 completely unable to fall asleep again.

So here I sit at 4-something-in-the-morning, fretting over something I can't control, and knowing that tomorrow is going to SUPER SUCK.

In fact, the next few months are going to super suck, because I realized after today's misunderstanding, that I haven't been sailing along smoothly at all.

In fact, I've been quite out of control for quite some time, and I am going to need to make some major, unpleasant changes in my life in the very near future.

Because the problem isn't that all of these demands have been placed upon me, the problem is that I have accepted these demands into my daily life by my own actions, and my own doing.

I am not a victim of a surprise, random attack today. I simply reaped the consequences of being much too over-extended, for far too long.

It shouldn't be any surprise that in trying to do it all, I haven't done any of it very well.

That's just the cold reality of where I am in my life right now. And it's 100% my own fault.

I've been running myself ragged, going in too many directions, trying to please too many people, and be in too many places.

I've wanted my kids to be able to participate in too many things.

I've fallen under the delusion that if something is worthwhile or has merit, of course it is worth incorporating into our schedule. I've wanted my kids to have every opportunity that all the other kids around them have. I haven't wanted to be left out. I haven't wanted them to be left out.

Except, it's not working.

Something has to change.

I've apologized as sincerely as I can for having hurt someone's feelings; I don't feel there is anything more I can do there.

Now I have the very unpleasant task of getting myself out of some of these committments that have become toxic to my sense of well-being.

And I'm dreading it.

I'm dreading letting people down.

I am dreading the disappointment that I know will come from my child, when I sit down to explain that we simply cannot continue to be involved in all of these activities.

We absolutely have to let some things go.

I'm nearing thirty-seven-years-old, and it's still hard- painful even- to accept that I have to let some things go.

But it's 4:21 a.m.

If my life is so out-of-control that I can't even sleep at night, something's gotta go.

Halloween

2011-11-01T09:41:00.000-07:00

It's early-October 1996, and Jon excitedly asks me,

"So what are we gonna be for Halloween this year?"

What?

I reply, "Nothing. We're adults."

I hadn't dressed up for Halloween since before puberty, and hadn't planned on dressing up for Halloween ever again.

I went to my job on October 31st of that year in my normal waitress costume, and Jon went to The Howl (USU's Halloween party) dressed up as the Tick. Too bad I wasn't obsessed with cameras back then; pictures of Jon as the Tick would have been fun to post.

Ahhhhh, I look back on stuff like that now and laugh. That silly little question, "What are we gonna be for Halloween this year?" is still haunting me. It's the scariest thing about October every year!

Jon STILL dresses up for Halloween, and at some point during the last 15 years, he talked me into dressing up too.

Aye, Matey! An ol' sea wench, I be.

But we're talking about Jon! Yes, he loves Halloween, and even though his costumes may not always be original, ya gotta give him credit for dressing up.

Here's a fond look back at some of our many Halloweens together over the years...

2002: Jon is a knight in shining armor, I am a princess, and Gage is a wizard.

2003: Jon is Gandalf, and Gage is Frodo

2004: He's a zombie
2005: He's a jailbird
2006: He's a garbage man

2007: He and Gage are ninjas
2008: He resurrects the knight costume,

2009: He's a ninja again
2010: He's the devil (yeah, that's about right).

And this year?

Well, he was a

sumo wrestler...

Never one to worry about embarrassing his wife, Jon goes all out for Halloween, and ya know what?

I've grown to appreciate it.

Some of my favorite things about Jon are reflected in his love of Halloween! He truly doesn't care about what other people think of him; if there's something he wants, he goes after it.

He's daring, adventurous, and fun-loving, yet ultra responsible wherever it really counts. He's so much less stressed about life than I am! He does what needs to be done, and then plays hard when the work is over. He's playful and energetic, funny and happy, crazy and carefree, and very, very loyal.

Even to Halloween.

Yep, there's never a dull moment around here, and I am slowly learning to appreciate it!

Birthdays, pumpkins, and parties

2011-10-30T18:44:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I am one of those once-a-month-update bloggers now. It's totally depressing. I used to LOVE blogging.

But alas,

there are just not enough hours in the day.

Every week is a blur of obligations. I still work in each of the kids' classrooms once a week,
and when Jon has a week-day off, I make him come with me:
The kids are still in all of their extra-curricular stuff: jujitsu, dance, soccer, gymnastics, and scouts...

and even though I feel very fortunate that they are able to participate in all of it, life continues to feel super, super busy around here.

I'm tired.

All the time.

I've pretty much been in get-through-this-one-day mode since school started, and it doesn't look like there's any end in sight!

So for journaling purposes, here's the chronological order of events as to how the month of October went down in the Child Fam!

October 2nd would have been my mom's 68th birthday, and it was also three days after the anniversary of her death 12 years ago. It was weird to think about the fact that if she had lived, she'd be 68 now. I wonder what she would have been like in her 60's, 70's, and 80's.

I usually write a letter to her on the anniversary of the day she died, but I didn't this year. It was a combination of being overwhelmed with other responsibilities, but mostly of not really wanting to let myself go there emotionally. I always want to give her the tribute she deserves, but I also wanted to spare myself (and Jon) the drama that always follows when I do write her a letter.

If I think about her too much, I'm a wreck.

I still miss her. Like crazy. There's still a void there. The loss is still huge.

I still feel robbed of something I am entitled to have. If we're entitled to nothing else in this life, surely we're entitled to a mother's love.

So I just didn't go there this year.

I'll somehow just have to accept, at some point, that I was lucky to have had her for 23 years. Except, it doesn't feel lucky. It feels like a rip off.

And my only son- who was never lucky enough to have met her- turned TEN on October 6th.

TEN!

I just can't even express how upsetting that was for me! I'm more than half-way done raising him, and he hasn't even been alive very long!

He had a small friend-party this year, enjoying dinner at John's Incredible Pizza, and then a sleep-over at our house with three of his buddies.

It made me happy to see him so happy.

Gage has kinda started to do the whole, "Chhhh, whatever, that sucks," and "Uhhhhh, WHY?" thing lately.

I can see that the teen years are definitely looming on the horizon, so it was very heart-warming to see him have a night of innocent childhood fun.

I'm afraid there won't be too many more of those, and when they're gone, they're gone for good.

It was great that he had such a fun birthday party this year, because he spent his actual birthday shivering in the snow at Mt. Lassen. (The 4th graders at his school spend two nights and three days in Lassen Volcanic National Park).

Jon attended the field trip while I stayed home with the girls; here's a shot of the boys at the top of Lassen's cinder cone volcano.

The trip was a huge success, mostly! Even though I stayed up until after midnight on the eve of their departure (making nut-free, egg-free brownies for 80 people because I wanted Gage to be able to pass out treats for everyone), Gage complained about having to wake up, and go to bed, away from home on his birthday.

I totally missed him, too.

It was weird having my firstborn away from home on his 10th birthday.

As soon as Jon and Gage returned from Lassen, there was more birthday celebrating to do! My brother, Jeff, has a birthday six days after Gage's on October 12, so the fam gathered at Fresh Choice to celebrate.

The following morning was the oh-so-cute Kindergarten French cafe, and ya know what? I now know why I spoil the crap out of Olivia.

Every single step and milestone she takes is a bitter-sweet "it-will-never-come-again" reality check for me.

This was my last French Cafe!

I spent the first two rolling my eyes and wondering what kind of crazy parents at that crazy school would go through that much trouble for a bunch of 5-year-olds who have no prayer of appreciating the production being put on around them.

I spent this one taking pictures and thinking that every last detail was adorable.

Except, I did have one complaint.

I don't know whose brilliant idea it was to give a bunch of Kindergartener's a French flag to wave around during the class picture...

Yeah, some chick is waving her stupid flag right in front of Olivia's face, and I'm really irritated by it!

I'm so happy to have a picture of every other kindergartener in the class, but my own kid is hidden behind a flag... grrr....

And, I continue to be living proof that there is truly no rest for the wicked, because the very next morning I found myself hauling three chairs and three kids to Ivy's soccer tournament.
Have I mentioned that I'm not a fan of soccer, and am still in shock that I have a kid who loves it?

It's weird. And annoying that Jon works so many Saturdays...

ANYWAY,

the following week was another busy blur. Ivy had a field trip to the river on October 19th, and Olivia had a field trip to the pumpkin patch on the 20th, but I wasn't able to attend either one,

because my sister had come from Utah for a visit, and I was too busy hanging with the fam to be bothered with field trips!

While the Wahnschaffe's were here, Emmit went to school with Gage, and Coen went to school with Ivy,

and then Janae and I ditched the kids with Grandpa,

and enjoyed a seester day shopping & playing in San Francisco!

It was pretty great!

We also celebrated Jim's birthday (on October 21st) at Round Table while Janae was here,
and it was pretty fun to have so many people there to wish him a happy birthday!

I was thrilled to get a picture of the whole crew that night (and yes, Jon is in trouble for ruining the only group shot of the day),

but the biggest event during the Wahnschaffe's visit this time was Ivy's baptism!

I don't have the pictures from Ivy's big day yet, because Miranda took all of the pictures with her camera (much to my delight), and Mir and I still need to get together, but here is Ivy in her baptism dress, eagerly awaiting the big event.

Do I comment often enough that this chick is completely adorable? She's just so cute and so great; I love her. A LOT!

She's just so easily contented with life. She's so eager, and happy, and ready-for-anything. She's not a stress-case like I am; she's a breath of fresh air!

Her baptism was beautiful, all of my family attended except Chris and Donna, and Ivy was all smiles... it was a great day!

We waved the Wahnschaffe's a fond farewell on October 24th, and ya know what? By Friday, the madness of Halloween had already begun, and I was in disbelief that yet another month had raced by...
Ya know what? I think I'll stop right there. Jon makes such a big deal out of Halloween, I think I'll dedicate an entire post to it!

Social Anxiety

2011-10-07T22:56:00.000-07:00

It's way past my bedtime, and I am deliriously tired (ya know, 'cause I'm normally so well-rested and all), but I can't fall asleep because I'm totally preoccupied with my inability to navigate social situations in a normal way.

The more nervous I am, the dumber the statements that come out of my mouth.

It's so upsetting.

I went out to dinner tonight with some moms from my kids' school, and I had every intention of sitting quietly and mostly listening. That's a good strategy for a person with social anxiety.

But my stay-at-home mom-ness trumped my social anxiety tonight, and my subconscious self was so excited to speak to another thinking adult, that I found myself talking, and talking, and talking,

and now I'm home regretting, and regretting, and regretting...

It is SUCH a good thing I don't consume alcohol. That's the only thing that could make my condition worse. Drunk Mary would surely have more remorse than sober Mary, but at least I'd probably be sleeping by now.

And I really do need to get some sleep. I have to get up and attend Ivy's soccer game tomorrow morning, and pretend like I know what a penalty box is, and what "playing off sides" means.

If I wasn't so sleep deprived all the time, I probably would have been able to figure that out by now.

Anyway,

I still don't like sports, and I think I might have social anxiety.

Wish me luck tomorrow.

September: School, Festivals, & Berkeley

2011-09-30T21:54:00.000-07:00

Let's see, September was a blur (just like every other month), so here's my attempt at documenting it before busy-October comes and goes!

School is back in with a serious vengeance; I'm working in classrooms again, begging, pleading, nagging, and bribing kids to get their homework done every night after dinner, attending field trips as often as possible, and coping with all the other "school-related" activities (like attending back-to-school nights, parent meetings, kid's presentations, etc.) that make September feel a little crazy!

The beginning of the school-year is tough!

I say that every year.

Gage's & Ivy's classes each had field trips to the Crocker Art Gallery this month,
and Olivia's class went to Kovar's karate academy.

To fulfil the parent-participation requirements at their school, I work in Gage's class on Mondays,
Ivy's class on Wednesdays,

and Olivia's class every other Thursday. But so far, my dad has been working that gig for me this year, so I'm enjoying a bit of a break there! (Wooo Whooo! THANK YOU, Grandpa)!

The opening unit this year at the kids' school was "Art," and the school holds a "Centers Day" each September (usually on the 3rd Friday), where the kids rotate through centers/stations, learning something about the school's opening unit at each station.

The Friday after "Centers Day" is "Culmination Day," where each grade level presents what they have learned during the first six weeks of school, in one big school-wide event!

It's pretty cute!

Olivia's Kindergarten class sang a few French songs for us,

Ivy's class took us on a virtual tour of the "art stops" that can be found around Sacramento,

and Gage's class presented a "fashion show" demonstrating different types of art movements: Romanticism, Impressionism, Realism, etc.

Yes, it has been busy, but I'm pleased to say that the school-year is off to a great start. I'm extremely pleased with each of their teachers, and appreciate that they are getting such a quality education; even if it does feel like a lot to keep up with!

We're still involved in all of the usual extra-curriculars too; Gage is plugging along in jujitsu 4 days a week, and he also goes to cub scouts whenever I have the energy to drag him there, but the kid still has no desire to participate in any form of athletics! Sometimes it stresses me out, because that's what boys are supposed to want to do. He definitely doesn't want to do it!

Bug is still enjoying gymnastics, and Ivy is involved in every possible activity known to 8-year-old girls (with the exception of music and horse-back riding lessons)! She's ridiculously over-scheduled, but she doesn't want to drop anything. I suppose that as the mother, it's my job to make her drop something.

And yet, she's still in soccer, dance, gymnastics, girl scouts, activity days (at church), and is currently begging me to let her join choir, violin, and piano.

It's ridiculous.

She makes me appreciate home-body Gage!

In addition to school and after-school activities, we had a few busy week-ends in September too!
Instead of attending Gold Rush Days in Old Sacramento for Labor Day this year, we tried something new and went to a festival in Walnut Creek.

The weather had been forecasted to be 100+ in Sacramento on Labor Day, so we opted for the much cooler Bay Area, and took a chance on something new.

It did not disappoint!

They had tons of shows and activities, and we ended up spending five and a half hours there!

They had human "hamster" balls,
(Gage & Ivy both loved these, but Bug was too afraid to try them),

face painting,
balloon tying, kids games,
more than a dozen bounce houses,

animal shows,celebrity appearances,
martial arts demonstrations,

and the always-popular carni-rides:

The kids had a great time, and I was happy that Jon had talked me into trying something new this year! My suggestion had been to go check out the Museum of Children's Art in Oakland... but I admit that Jon's idea turned out to be way better!

Admission to the festival was $25 for our whole family, and another $35 for the carnival rides, but everything else was free. We brought lunch in and picnicked on the grass, so even food costs were minimal. It was an awesome, inexpensive day of fun for the fam!

The next week-end was a 21st birthday dinner for my nephew, Nicholas,

but it was a pretty low-key affair,

and I'm not sure it was a very exciting celebration for him! The following week-end was my Crescent City get-away,

and the week-end after that was the "Candy Festival" at the Jelly Belly Factory in Fairfield.

Having just been at the Labor Day festival in Walnut Creek three weeks earlier, we couldn't help but compare the two, and the Candy Festival was pretty much

lame.
We let the kids go on the ferris wheel once because they had loved it so much in Walnut Creek, but everything at the Candy festival was WAY overpriced, including the admission to get in!
We checked out a few of the freebies,
but didn't stay very long (an hour-ish) before we decided to cut our losses and move on.
Since we were already within 20 miles of Berkeley, I persuaded Jon into taking the kids there (they've never been), and it was quite the eye-opening experience for Gage!

We weren't even 20 feet from the car before a disheveled, mumbling, strung-out, lunatic came ambling down the sidewalk, and as soon as I heard the stream of profanities coming out of his mouth, I thought, "Uh oh! I hope the kids don't know most of those words yet! Maybe they won't notice that this crazy guy is cussing his head off."

They noticed!

I turned around to look at Gage, and his eyes were as big as saucers while he says, "That's the most swear words I've ever heard in a single sentence."

Yeah Todo, we're not in Kansas anymore.

A few hundred feet later, Gage looked up at this sign and said, "Mom, are we really in a drug zone?" and Jon replied "YES" at the exact same time that I said "NO"!

I tried to explain to him that the sign actually said "Drug Free Zone," but someone had spray painted over the "free" part of the sign.

"Well," I admitted, "there are probably a few drugs around here." and Gage said, "WHERE? Where are they? Can I see some?"

Jon was not at all pleased! He HATES Berkeley, and has never wanted to take our kids there! I love Berkeley and have always wanted to take our kids there!

It's just such a fun, unique atmosphere, and yeah, there are a lot of people there that I wouldn't want my kids to grow up and emulate, but come on! Taking them Berkeley during their childhood will hardly cause them to grow up to be drug-using anarchists. And actually, I'm thinking it will probably do the opposite!

We walked up and down Telegraph, and walked through the University campus for a bit. Gage was intrigued and excited to "see college," while Jon and I reminisced about our good ol' college days that now feel a hundred years in the past...We paused by a Berkeley police car so I could show Jon that there is law and order on the streets of Berkeley, and the cop was so nice, he offered to let my kids check out his car!
It was pretty cute!

This was already beating the pants off the Crappy Candy Festival (which, I may point out, had been Jon's idea)!

We bought some Berkeley souvenirs- patches for the kids backpacks, and an anklet for me,
and then filled up on Blondies pizza before heading home! Yep, it was a super-fun day!

And overall, September was a pretty fun month. It's funny how the day to day stresses of life can nearly send me over the edge sometimes, but the big picture usually makes me feel pretty lucky, and pretty content. Life is pretty good.

It's a lot of work,

but it's still pretty good!

Refill Happy

2011-09-28T08:56:00.000-07:00

I was getting my much-loved refill of Diet Pepsi this morning, when the girl at the Chevron cash-register said, "Why are you so happy all the time? You're one of the happiest people I've ever met!"

WHAT?

I laughed, and said,

"Oh, I'm super happy when I come in here because I know I'm only 30 seconds away from a yummy swig of Diet Pepsi! But this is the only time of the day that I'm actually happy."

Okay, so I'm probably happier during other times of the day too. Bed time is always happy...

It sure made me think though!

Why AM I so happy every time I get a refill? I'm actually plagued with guilt about the terrible example I'm setting for my children, and the hypocrisy in my "Do as I say, not as I do" daily message to them.

Soda drinking is a disturbingly unhealthy habit.

One of these days I'm gonna have to kick it for good.

But not today!

Nope. Ivy came into our room at 11:30 last night to tell me that she couldn't sleep. I tucked her back into bed, and she came back at 2:30 to tell me that Olivia had wet the bed.

Are you kidding me? I don't think that has happened since Bug was 2! What is going on?

I change the sheets, get Bug cleaned up and tucked back into bed around 2:50, and at 3:15, Ivy is back in my room to tell me that Watson is tearing through the girls room and waking them up.

Oh my gosh. This is starting to make me mad. Is Jon, the so-called "lightest sleeper in the world" actually sleeping through all of this?

I'm out of bed, again, to corner the cat, and throw her stupid butt outside, while getting the kids settled back into their beds and back to sleep as soon as possible. (All three of them have been awakened by the cat's seizure at this point).

Great.

They're gonna have a wonderful day tomorrow, trying to function on the 4 hours of sleep they're getting.

I'm finally back in my bed at 3:30, and it feels like I have just closed my eyes when the alarm goes off at 6:00.

NOOOOOOOO!

I hit snooze until 6:30,

and eventually roll out of bed feeling like a truck has run over me.

No time to dwell on that, though! I slept in, and now it's the mad morning rush of getting kids fed, lunches packed, homework loaded into back-packs, and kids off to school.

Yeah, I am definitely skipping the gym this morning!

Instead, I head straight to Chevron, where at 8:05 in the morning, I am smiling wide at the blissful clinking sounds of the ice cubes filling up my refill bucket, and the smooth flow of carbonated bliss flowing over the top of them.

Diet Pepsi makes me so happy!

Is that such a crime?

Alas,

I fear that for a Mormon Mama,

it is.

Which is just one of the many reasons I will always feel inadequate, especially when I'm in the company of other Mormon Mamas, who don't seem to struggle with such things as caffeinated mornings, or anything else for that matter.

But, there's no time to dwell on any of that today! I'm off to work in Ivy's classroom, and I'm tellin' you what! My refill is gonna make that gig a whole lot more tolerable...

I'll kick my bad habit another day.

Lonesome Me

2011-09-19T21:22:00.000-07:00

I finally got what I wished for.

I was A L O N E!
Completely ALONE

for two entire days, in one of the most beautiful places on Earth!

It was pretty great.

Just how did I manage a solo vacation in the middle of crazy September, you ask?

Well, my oldest brother and his wife, Chris and Donna, asked me to come to Crescent City for a few days to help out while Donna underwent major surgery. And while I did experience a bit of guilt (and concern) about leaving Jon and the kids behind for four days (and for asking my dad to watch the kids while Jon was at work), it turned out to be a spectacularly great opportunity to decompress from the stresses of my every-day life.

I LOVE CRESCENT CITY!

I left Sacramento on Thursday, September 15, and just three hours into the seven-hour drive, I passed a sign for Whiskeytown Falls.

I want to go to Whiskeytown Falls!

So I did.

I parked my car, loaded my day-pack with bottled water, a mini bagel, and an apple, and set off on my first solo hike. EVER.

Ever in my life!

It was exciting and scary and adventurous and creepy and super, super cool.

At the beginning of the trail I was more intrigued and excited about a spontaneous adventure than I was nervous about being alone, so I sauntered along feeling free as a bird, snapping pictures,
and taking in the sights.

It wasn't long, however, before the first "critter-rustle" in the bushes sent me into panic mode! I'm sure it was just a small bird or a lizard, but I instantly began envisioning the serial killer who must be stalking me, and was just waiting for the right moment to tackle and rape me right here on the trail!

Jon will never know what happened to me!
I'm so far off the highway, it'll take weeks to find my car!
My cell phone has no reception in the middle of nowhere!

My casual saunter immediately became a brisk jog, and before I knew it, I had made it to the falls!

They really were pretty, but I didn't enjoy them long! I spent about 90 seconds taking pictures,

and then it was back to a terror-filled jog until I reached the safety of my car.

I can't say that I savored many of the sights during that hike; I was scanning the bushes for rapists, mountain lions, bigfoot, and bears while I ran as fast as my legs could carry me.

It is definitely safe to say that terror improves my athletic performance!

Blaring the air conditioning and feeling the mixed euphoria of freedom, victory, and adrenaline, I hopped back onto highway 299 toward my ultimate destination: Crescent City.

It was fun and scary to be so alone! I hadn't seen another living soul the entire time I'd been off the main highway, and it was super cool, and highly disconcerting, all at the same time.

About two and a half hours later, I stopped again in Trinidad for a shwill, and decided to rest at the beach for a few minutes while I ate my brown-bagged dinner.

It was so weird to feel lonely and excited all at the same time! I seem to talk a lot-

like constantly-

and it really was weird to be in Trinidad, where I am always with my family, and not have anyone to talk to.

Sunset on the beach was spectacular, but there was no-one to comment to!

The Trinidad lighthouse was cool too, but again, I just sat there alone and thought it to myself. Is it possible to be lonely and happy all at the same time?

Before long I was back on the road, and once at Chris & Donna's house, the loneliness wore off pretty quickly! We chatted until 1 o'clock, and then they left the following morning for Donna's surgery.

By 9:30 a.m. I was alone again- except for the two irritating Bischon's I was dog-sitting- and trust me, they don't count as company. They have all the annoyances of a toddler, and NONE of the cuteness! Stinky breath, stained faces, and regular pooping schedules.

Ugh.

I spent the first day shopping (for fun as well as for groceries) and cooking, and then took a break from domestic duties around 5 in the evening to go jogging through Tolowa Dunes State Park. Again, it was both exciting and weird to be alone!

I left my car on the side of the remote road I had parked on, and headed out on my jog, hoping that no-one would break into it while I was gone. The entire time I ran, I kept imagining the gang of heartless thugs who were sure to be waiting for me when I got back! The logical fear would have been of bears, but my thoughts were pretty much focused on the criminals who I was certain were stalking me.

I think I might stop watching "I Survived" so much...

And I'm serious that terror improves my athletic performance!

I spent the rest of the evening taking dogs out to pee, handling hot dog "treats" with my bare hands, and preparing meals for Chris & Donna for the days following her surgery.

On Saturday morning I tidied their already-clean house, and having finished all my domestic chores, set out on another solo day of adventures!

It was so fun! Day two of being completely alone!

I cannot believe how much more productive I am when the only thing I have to worry about is myself. I'm a pretty low-maintenance chick I think!

By Noon I was hiking near Enderts Beach Overlook, all by myself!

The weather was spectacular, and the sights were just breath-taking! I glanced at my cell phone a few times to see if I had service, but I didn't. There was no way I could call anyone to brag, even if I wanted to.

Yep, I was most definitely alone.

And the entire time, I couldn't make up my mind if it was a good thing or a bad thing!

I spent my entire Saturday hiking, and I kept right on hiking until I ran into bigfoot poop (which was more likely bear diarrhea), and then it seemed wise to assess my circumstances.

I haven't seen another living soul in at least 40 minutes.

The liquid part of this excrement is still very much liquid.

Perhaps it's not the best idea to continue on in bear (or bigfoot) territory alone!

Yep. There's range after range of rugged, mountain terrain all around me. And no people. And no cell phone reception.

Hmmmmm. I guess I better turn around.

I HATE leaving a trail without getting to end of it!

I'll just have to come back to this one later with Jon.

It turned out to be okay, though. I ventured over to the more populated Jedediah Smith State Park, and did finish a few hikes!

I made it to Boy Scout Tree,

and Fern Falls,

and wrapped up the day at Battery Point Lighthouse.
When I finally made it back to Chris & Donna's that evening, they had returned home from the hospital, and Donna was in great spirits!

Percocet seems to have that effect on people!

The following morning, we had breakfast at Chart Room in the Crescent City Harbor,

and then Chris and I hiked one more awesome trail (Damnation Creek)

before I headed back toward Sacramento, and my adorable little family that, by this point, I was desperately missing.

It had been a very much needed, very much appreciated reprieve from the chaos of my every-day life, and I told Chris & Donna that they can call me anytime they need a little help!

I loved every minute of my slow, tranquil, reflective vacation; even the moments of loneliness.

Sometimes you need to step away from the big picture to truly appreciate the masterpiece that it is.

And I was very happy when I came home to my life's work, which is every bit as beautiful and rewarding and awe-inspiring as the adventure I'd just returned from!

My Little Soccer Star

2011-09-13T14:33:00.001-07:00

WOW, is it just me, or is September completely CRAZY?

I dread back-to-school every year, and this must be why! There's just too much back-to-everything! Parent meetings for this, kid's activities for that...

I'm already sick of it all! The sheer amount of WORK that parenting requires is just

Nevermind.

I vowed to stop complaining.

I also decided that I will stop allowing any of the things my kids say- or do- to embarrass me.

Guess how long that lasted?

Ivy started soccer last month, and she's been so excited about it, because she's been begging to play soccer for at least 2 years. Maybe more.

I tried really hard to direct her toward other things: ballet, gymnastics, jazz dance, even violin. I just didn't want the commitment of soccer, and plus, I think soccer people are crazy.

They're like obsessed with it.

I hated soccer as a kid, and I just don't envision myself as one of those moms on the sidelines now, whooping and hollering, and acting as if there's some real consequence to whether the kids win the game or not.

It all just seems like such a waste of time. I'm so not into sports!

But apparently, Ivy is.

So I've been carting her practices, and buying her heel cushions for her cleats, and trying to be as supportive as I can fake. Then last week, she had her second "game."

Oh my gosh, I just don't even know how to describe how tough it was!

First of all, Jon works constantly, so he hasn't been to any of her practices or games. We seriously look like dead-beat parents, because I am definitely of the "drop-her-and-run" mentality when it comes to practices, and Jon never attends anything.

So I show up to the game on Saturday- ALONE- and it feels like everyone is already everyone else's BFF. Their kids have all been playing together for years, and they're all super tight. I'm the only "single mom" there- some families even have grandparents and aunts & uncles in the crowd- and I'm feeling 100% out of my element. I mean, I typically do everything I can to avoid sporting events. Especially on Saturday mornings, which were divinely created for sleeping-in.

I plop my chair down on the side of the field next to the friendliest-looking mom I see, and I try to mentally gear myself up for Ivy's second game. (The first game didn't count, apparently, because it was "kick-off," whatever that means).

I'm thinkin' positive thoughts! I mean, this game is off to a good start already, because it isn't taking place in 100 degree weather like the last one. Maybe this'll be fine! Ivy plays soccer. This is cute!

The game begins, and even though Ivy is on the bench 'cause she's new, I'm watching anyway because I thought it would be rude to read.

The more I watch, however, the more I realize that some of these 8-year-olds are crazy good!

I mean, I don't really know what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't little kids jumping into the air to stop the ball with their chests and then gain control of it with their feet!

Wow!

Ivy's on a good team!

Really good!

I'm becoming a bit concerned, because although Ivy is far more athletic than I've ever even hoped to be, I've never seen her demonstrate any of this type of prowess! I hope she can keep up with these kids!

Within a few minutes, the coach trades her in, and it doesn't take long for me to realize that maybe Ivy doesn't have much more athletic ability than me!

Crap!

Again, I don't really know what I was expecting. I sorta just thought I'd watch her run around, kicking some stupid ball toward a goal, and I just hoped she'd be kicking toward the right one.

She seriously looked like a deer in headlights!

She didn't even come close to making contact with the ball during the entire first half, but I'll tell you what! The other girls were all over that stupid ball!

CRAP!

How on Earth have I gotten us into this?

I'm sitting on the side of some dewy soccer field all by myself, watching my sweet "new girl" on the team- who happens to SUPER SUCK AT SOCCER- get left behind on the field!

NOW WHAT?

I'm running through the entire thought process of, "How do I shield her from the fact that she's crappy at this?" and, "How do I apologize to the other parents for dragging their superstar team down?" and, "What if she doesn't know she sucks and I have to endure nine more of these horrible games?"

Feeling a wave of PTSD from my own pitiful soccer-playing childhood, I've worked myself up into a silent, panicked, frenzy with the immediate realization that just because Ivy wants to play soccer doesn't mean that she can.

Oh my gosh! I'm so mad!

Trying to conceal my shame at being a disinterested and highly reluctant soccer mom- while simultaneously worrying that my poor little Ivy is gonna come off of that stupid field in tears- I look up to watch her actually tap her hesitant little foot on that ever-so-elusive ball.

It was just one fleeting, lame little kick. The other girls got it away from her in about a nano second, but Ivy had touched the ball, and before I knew it, I was cheering and yelling and encouraging her like a Professional Soccer Mom.

YEAH!!! GOOD JOB IVY!!! YOU DID IT!!! GO IVES!!!

As soon as I heard her coaches and another mom cheering for her too, my pride shifted instantly to embarrassment, as I realized how bad she must really be if everyone else thought this tiny little tap was a big enough accomplishment to holler over!

UGH!

Yep, we're the new, sucky people on the team. And it totally embarrassed me.

But, look at her!

She thinks she's awesome.

AND SHE IS!!!

By some miracle, Ivy has managed to escape all of my baggage. Ya know, those ridiculous but persistent inner demons who remind me that I'm not wanted or worthy or welcome anywhere unless I have A LOT to contribute. The fear that I'll be rejected anyway, even if I do contribute?

Yeah, lucky for her, she's not like me.

She didn't come off the soccer field in tears; she came off grinning!

I was so proud of her, and so amazed that once again, the kid was teaching the parent something that the parent should have been teaching the kid.

Ivy is every bit as entitled to play on that soccer field as every other kid out there, and she doesn't suck, she ROCKS! She went out there, and she played her best, and she came home happy. She did exactly what she was supposed to do!

She IS a superstar.

And I'm crazy proud of her.

My happy, adorable, eager, little Soccer Star!

And it looks like I've got nine more games to go...

How I Spent My Summer Vacation

2011-08-29T21:19:00.000-07:00

Ahhh, the kids went back to school a week ago today, and life is slowly returning to some sort of consistency.

Routines.

Schedules.

Homework.

Yep, we're back to the old grind around here, and as usual, I am completely ambivalent about all of it! Part of me welcomes the structure- I know the kids were desperately needing it, especially at the end there- but another (pretty big) part of me dreads the responsibility.

Summer means playing, and the school-year means working- Bummer- so I'm dedicating this post as my fond farewell to the summer of 2011.

Here's a quick look back at how we spent our 10 weeks out of school!

We celebrated my dad's 66th birthday,

and Miranda's 36th birthday in early June;

then two weeks after that was Father's Day,

and by that time, summer was in full swing!

The kids spent their days swimming,

(nights, too)

playing,

and hanging out!

Ivy celebrated her 8th birthday on June 30th, and could not take her eyes off her brand-new DSi long enough to even notice a camera pointed at her.

Before we knew it, June was over, and July came in with a bang!

Literally!

We spent the 4th with the grandparents in Brookings, Oregon,

and had a fabulous time playing in the water,

and exploring the tidepools!

We made it back to Sacramento in time to throw Ivy a birthday party on July 9th,

before heading East to spend some time in Tahoe.

Brett & Jamie passed through town in July, and then we were excited to see even more family when the Wahnschaffe's arrived on July 30th!

As expected, the cousins had a great time hanging out together!

Before we knew it, August was here, and it promised to be just as busy as June and July had been!

Ivy started soccer,

Riley reconnected with two of her California BFF's,

and we continued to enjoy some quality "family time" with a trip to Woodland,

and a long visit with Aunt Donna! Gualala was definitely the hightlight of August,

but some other honorable mentions would be the amazing 10-Piano concert we attended at UC Davis, (10 pianists played the exact same piece in unison- and Ivy's little friend Manon was a star performer),

and my tour of Folsom Prison, where one of my good friends works as a recreational therapist with the inmates (nope, ya can't take pictures at the prison)!

Of course, no summer would be complete without a trip to Sunsplash,

and OH MY GOSH, the next thing I know, we are attending the "Back to School" picnic at the park on August 18th!

AHHHHHH!

My firstborn is now a 4th-grader,

Cute little "Puppy" is a 3rd grader,And my little Bug is in Kindergarten!

OH MY GOSH!

It's crazy how fast their little lives are passing me by, and that, my friends, is why I blog.

It's been a blur, but a very fun blur, and now it's time to buckle down, get serious,

and get some sleep!

Gualala

2011-08-22T22:57:00.000-07:00

Gualala 2011- the Lema Family Reunion

that wasn't!

Yep, all 5 of my parent's kids were supposed to meet in Gualala for a family reunion this summer, and it would have been the first time we were all together since July of 2006.

BUT, it didn't really work out!

None of my brothers were able to come, for a variety of reasons. Work conflicts, travel inconvenience, and of course, plain old-fashioned-drama, but I'll spare you all the gory details.

Let's just say I was disappointed, but whatever. The Lema's who did make it to Gualala had a great time!

And, four of the five siblings (plus the Patriarch!) were able to get together for a family dinner in Sacramento right before the big trip, so it's all good!
Yeah, even though it was served on paper and plastic, that dinner totally counts! We sorta did have a Lema family reunion this summer... one, big, happy, (crazy) family...

But back to Gualala!
We had a great trip!

Yep, this is another "vacation" post, so consider yourself forewarned!

Gualala is a tiny little beach town on California's highway 1; the Southern-most town in Mendocino County. It takes about 3 1/2 hours to get there from Sacramento, and it's not an easy drive. Gage & Ivy puked on the way there, and on the way home. (Ugh...)

But, like most things in life requiring patience and hard work, it was totally worth it!

We camped at Gualala Point Regional Park, and LOVED IT!

And since Jon hates to tent-camp, (and we were too poor to rent a tent-trailer this year), he and Gage slept under the stars like homeless people.

It was weird.

But the boys claimed to have enjoyed it...

Whatever.

The campground itself is small but beautiful, located right on the river, about 1 mile from the ocean. There are trails leading out of the campground,

along the bluff to the beaches, and eventually right into the town of Gualala.

The scenery there was spectacular- as is usually the case by the ocean- and we spent 3 days hiking, tidepooling, wave-chasing, eating smores, playing cards, battling raccoons, and enjoying the last little bit of summer vacation in the beautiful outdoors!

I loved it.

There's something about the ocean that calms me right down, and I seriously just cannot get enough of it!

We spent the first day of vacation traveling in the morning, and then setting-up camp in the afternoon. Then as soon as the campsites were up, we headed out on a trail right across from our site.

Before long, the ocean was in sight, and the Wahnschaffes were so excited to get to it, they abandoned the trail and began to forge their own way down the side of a grassy cliff!
I saw them descending down uncharted territory and commented to Janae that there was no way Jon would go down that cliff- much less take our kids down there- but by the time I had reached the edge, Jon was already half-way down with all three of them!

WHAT?

He is super-ultra-mega-cautious! He won't even let me go to Walmart after 10 o'clock!

I couldn't imagine what had caused him to abandon all sense of reason until I looked down and saw this!
Yep.

Once the boys had spotted this cave, there would be no keeping them out of it.

Not even a bunch of little kids.

This end-of the-summer adventure was really turning into a serious adventure!

We all scaled the side of the cliff and made it down to the bottom in one piece (miraculously), and the kids were so excited to have accessed our own private beach, we spent the entire evening there!

And, although the "cave" turned out to be just a hollowed-out-room, the beach ended up being a pretty cool place to hang out for awhile!

The weather was absolutely beautiful, and if we hadn't been driven out by hunger, I'm sure we would have lingered a lot longer. It was a truly perfect day at the ocean!
Everyone had a ball, including Coen, who had a little too much fun!

The child had soaked himself to the bone while chasing waves, so he opted to hike back to camp in his underwear, and Ivy's sweatshirt!

It was pretty funny! Coen is one hilarious little kid; he had us laughing on day 1, and we never stopped!

Once back at camp, we warmed our dinner of chicken enchilada soup, welcomed Grandpa to the party, and broke out the smores around the campfire.

Luckily for me, my pharmacist hubby had drugged me with benadryl (and gave me ear plugs) at bedtime, so I actually slept pretty well that night!

The following morning we were up bright and early to cook breakfast, pack our lunches into the day-packs, and head off on the day's adventures.

We hiked along Gualala Bluff Trail, taking in the beautiful scenery,

and searching for tidepools.

All of the tidepools we spied required more cliff climbing,
so once again, everyone descended without incident.

The tidepools were full of critters, and the kids had a great time checkin' stuff out. (Even the oafy teen-ager had fun)!

My kids go tidepooling quite a bit; at least 3 times a year, and some years, much more than that. So it was cool to see the different types of pools in Gualala, compared with the Crescent City and Marin County tidepools they most frequently see.

We saw a lot of anemones, and they were pretty big compared to the ones we normally run across! There were also plenty of starfish, and far more hermit crabs than rock crabs. Tyler and Emmit found a few abalone shells- a rare find for us- and we also enjoyed the company of some sunbathing sea lions just a few rocks over!

It was really fun to explore the rocks with the Wahnschaffes, and after an hour or two of tidepooling, we stopped for a lunch break. (And a rest)!

After lunch, we hiked to the "cave beach," as the kids had been begging to go back since we'd left the previous night!

We spent the rest of the afternoon there, burying Emmit in the sand,
playing on the beach,climbing more rocks,
and watching Jon, Tyler, Gage, and Emmit build a fort out of driftwood.

We finally rounded the crew up for dinner, but first had to climb back up the cliff to catch the trail!

It was kinda crazy how we just kept climbing up and down the sides of these grassy cliffs like it was no big deal.

It was kind of a big deal!

And not very safe! We drove into Gualala that night for dinner, because a great big family meal had been the one and only activity we'd planned for our reunion!

We were all supposed to have met up at the restaurant that night, and even though it was just my fam, Janae's fam, and my dad who actually attended the "reunion," we decided to go ahead with "dinner out" as planned.

I'm so glad we did!

It was awesome!

The restaurant had an ocean view, the food was spectacularly good, and the service was excellent. It had really been a treat!After dinner, we headed back to the campground for our nightly routine of campfire chats & smores. The girls were excited to help with the "dishes" (rinsing out the thermos's we'd packed our lunches in that day), and it was pretty cute! They were eager to help with the "chores" while we were camping, and I was trying to figure out how I could motivate them to be this helpful at home! Bed-time on the second night was far less successful than the first! I hadn't taken any benadryl, and while I did have my earplugs in, I found myself being constantly disturbed and/or awakened by barking dogs, critters on the tarp, and then at five in the morning, by the sound of plastic crinkling right by my tent door.

I unzipped the tent and was startled to find a well-fed raccoon feasting on a bag of hamburger buns right in front of the tent door! I yelped loud enough to scare him a few feet away, but the little thief was glaring at me with his wild, matted hair standing on end, and it was obvious that he was in "fight" mode. He wasn't givin' up those buns!

I grabbed the bag of overprocessed flour and synthetic chemicals, threw it as far as I could from the tent, and he instantly went after it.

I never fell back asleep after my dreadful encounter with the rabid raccoon, so I finally just decided to get up for the day around 6:30.

At first I was irritated because I was so tired, and I HATE it when I am prevented from sleeping! But, after I stumbled out to the coolers and poured a bowl of granola & milk, I sat by the propane firepit and actually enjoyed about 30 minutes of being alone.

It was quiet, the air was fresh & crisp, and I was cozy by the fire...

That stupid raccoon actually gave me the only few minutes of "alone time" I would experience throughout the entire trip!

The rest of the crew staggered out of the tents one by one, and after breakfast, Grandpa and Janae ran into town to do a load of laundry while the rest of us hung out at the campsite all morning.

Tyler & Riley taught us how to play the card-game "Scum,"

and then the three little kids and I walked around the park gathering firewood so we could burn stuff in a real fire! (You can't throw your trash in the firepit)!

Once Grandpa and Janae made it back, we set off on Day 3's adventures!

We picked a new trail, and set off looking for more tidepools.

It didn't take long to find some, but these were even more inaccessible than any of the previous tidepools had been!

We climbed down a seriously scary-lookin' cliff, and once again, everyone made it down without injury!The tide had already started to come in when we began tidepooling, and the group kept migrating further South to see what was in the next pools over. Pretty soon, we had gotten ourselves trapped on a beach, as the tide had come in past the rocks we'd crossed over.

Crap!

I had a brief moment of panic when I looked at Olivia and realized that we were gonna have to find some way to climb back up, or we'd be trapped on these rocks with no cell phone reception for at least 6 hours!

We started discussing it and realized we needed to get back up to that ridge, now, so we all started scouting out places to potentially climb.

It didn't look good!

We were facing some pretty steep cliffs in every direction, and I still can't believe the cliff we ended up scaling on that last day to escape high tide. With five kids who were between the ages of 5 & 9, no less!

Yeah, it was quite the adventure, and pretty reckless!

And mercifully, no-one was injured!

After lunch we hiked to Gualala beach, but it was so windy we decided not to stay, but went back to our secret-cove "cave beach" once more.

The kids played, the adults chatted, and at some point, Tyler & Grandpa decided they were gonna make a fire on the beach with some of the drift wood.

They seemed to have a bit of difficulty with getting the fire to burn, so my dad walked over to Janae and asked if he could see the book she was reading.

She hands him her paperback, and he proceeds to flip to the back, and tears out a page or two for kindling!

Librarian that she is, Janae is horrified by my dad defiling her book, so when she sees him coming back for more, she calls out to Royce,

"Hey, get over here and help these guys! Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum are trying to light a fire, and it's not working."

Coen: "Yeah! And Tweedle Dum just ripped a page out of Janae's book!"

I don't know which was funnier; the fact that Coen refers to his mom by her first name when he talks about her, or the fact that he knew Grandpa was Tweedle Dum!

Eventually the fire was burning strong, the boys felt triumphant, and Janae forgave Grandpa for ripping pages out her book... On our last night in camp, we had MORE smores,more chatting, and more fun hangin' with the fam! It wasn't a very well-attended "family reunion", but we'd had a ton of fun anyway!After we tucked the kids into bed, I was getting ready to head there myself when I was suddenly confronted with my arch nemesis...
I was horrified to see that the masked thief had returned! And not only that, he had brought his entire thug family with him to steal what was left of our food! They were waiting in the trees, hangin' behind the dumpster, skulking across the road.

They were EVERYWHERE!

It was so upsetting, but the most traumatic part of all of it was realizing that the problem was my insane sister, who was actually tossing marshmallows to them!

She's lucky it was our last night there, and I was too exhausted to retaliate. I swear I would have put a big pile of graham crackers by her tent door, and I had already decided that if another raccoon woke me during the night, that's exactly what I would do.

Luckily for her, Jon slipped me some more benadryl and tucked me safely into my bed where I quickly slipped into a drug-induced stupor that lasted until sunrise.

Yep, all in all, our trip to Gualala had been quite an adventure,

and it was a pretty fun camping trip indeed. The cousins had a ball together, and I always love hangin' with my seester!

I can't think of a better way to end the summer than with a family reunion at the beach!

I think I'm gonna plan another one for next year!

Horsetail Falls

2011-08-10T10:18:00.001-07:00

Where has the summer gone this year?

My days are a blur, and apparently, I haven't been able to manage my time very effectively!

I had all these plans for the summer, including having the kids read every day (that didn't even kind of happen), and whata ya know! Here we are with 11 days left until school starts, and I don't feel like I've scratched much off of my summer "to do" list!

Nope, we haven't been very productive, but we have played a lot this summer!

Since I last posted, we've been to Lake Tahoe and Gualala, and we're going to Sunsplash in 4 days. My sister's family came to visit, Ivy started soccer (she's thrilled; I'm not), Gage's jujitsu changed locations, Ivy dropped Irish Dance, and Buggy started ballet.

It's been a non-stop blur around here, but I really can't complain a bit; we've had a great summer!

Our trip to Lake Tahoe in mid-July was no exception.

We played at the lake, lounged in the park, and dined at the Forest Buffet on the top floor of Harrahs, but the highlight of the day was hiking a trail I've been wanting to check out for at least 4 years.

Now that Olivia is five-and-a-half, we're feeling a little more adventurous, so we headed East and spent the morning climbing to the base of Horsetail Falls.

You can see the falls from Highway 50, and even though our kids are still way too little to climb to the top, the trail leading to the base of the falls is only about 1.5 miles long.

Three miles round-trip is totally do-able!

Jon had a Thursday off, so we yanked the kids out of swimming lessons, gymnastics, and jujitsu, and headed up highway 50!

We began at the trailhead right off the highway,

and set off with our bottled water, high expectations, and picnic lunch in our day-packs!

First of all, I just have to say that both Jon and I LOVE Lake Tahoe! The Tahoe forests are beautiful, and such a perfect escape/retreat from the hustle & bustle of life in Sacramento! We are always feeling spoiled when we're there, so this particular hike was exciting for me because it still feels relatively new for me to have this much "freedom."

No strollers, no diaper bags, no baby-packs! No Desitin, no binkys, no pull-ups!

I am relishing this new-found freedom, and thoroughly enjoying this phase of life with our kids. At 9, 8, and 5, they are big enough to be self-sufficient, and little enough to still want to be with us.

I love it.

And because I had been wanting to hike this trail since Olivia was an infant, it felt like a huge milestone for us to finally be on it. And all three of our kids were walking without assistance!

The beginning of the trail runs alongside a creek,

and with the fresh mountain air, spectacular forest, and smooth trickle of flowing water, I knew we were guaranteed a fabulous day ahead!

Everyone was excited except Gage, who kept mumbling things like, "Today sucks! I hate hiking! Why do we have to do this?"

Poor kid. He was definitely born into the wrong family if he hates hiking...

Before long, the babbling creek next to the trail had become more like a rushing river,

with a few mini waterfalls to keep us all motivated toward the biggie at the end!

About 1/4 of the way up, the dirt trail disappeared, and the landscape turned into giant slabs of granite. All of us thought this was super cool, except Gage, who had scraped his leg on a rock.

"I hate today. I hate hiking. Why do we have to do this?"

I can't wait for him to become a teen-ager...

Jon and I were having a pretty great time; the only way to tell where we were supposed to be going was by locating the trail markers that were nailed to trees along the route.

It was pretty cool!

I haven't hiked on granite since I was in Yosemite!

By this point, the girls began joining in the "I hate hiking" chant. We were hiking in direct sunlight, and although it was in the low 80's that day, it felt hotter!

Ivy was sweating and whining, while Gage was grumbling and mumbling. Bug wasn't too distressed, because Jon and I had been complimenting her expert hiking skills, and flattery gets you a LONG way with that chick.

The hiking dialogue was something like,

Gage: "Uhhhhh. MOM! Why do you make us go hiking all the time? I HATE hiking. My leg hurts, and.... [insert whining here] ....."

Ivy: I'm HOT. Why can't we hike in the shade? How much more are you gonna make us hike? My feet hurt. Uhhhhhhh, are we almost done?"

Bug: "Churl Marker! I see a churl marker!" (That would be the "trail markers" she kept spying along the way)!

Jon didn't seem to be annoyed with all the whining, and I wasn't either; we both found it quite amusing! It was such a cool hike, the weather was so great, and the mountain air was so fresh. The views were spectacular; it was AWESOME!

We kept reassuring the kids it would be worth it once we got to the top!

We passed a middle-aged couple on the way up, and they offered to take a picture of our "adorable family" for us! (Yep, that's what I was thinking- they're just adorable)!

Actually, I think they look a lot happier in this photo than they really were! (I did coach them to "Smile! Pretend you're happy!" and it looks like they do listen to me sometimes)!

We pressed on, and came to another mini-waterfall, where the kids wondered,

"Oh good! Is this it? Are we done now?"

Sorry! Not yet!

I guess a mile-and-a-half feels far when you're little!

I wonder if Jon will ever let me take a normal picture of him...
We hiked on,
and finally made it to the top of Pyramid Creek Trail!
The water was crystal clear, and freezing cold!
The scenery was spectacular, and I felt victorious; we made it!

We found a perfect shady spot on the rocks to rest for lunch,
and enjoyed a great picnic at the bottom of beautiful Horsetail Falls.

It was exciting to have made it up there with the kids, but I was already imagining the next challenge.

I've got my sights set on this!

In five years, the Child Family is gonna backpack to the top of those falls, and I can't wait!

The hike down was considerably easier for the kids to tolerate! Maybe having food in their tummies helped, or maybe they were feeling as victorious as I was, but whatever the reason, we had a pleasant descent.

Mostly.

Ivy's nickname is "Puppy," and every now and then, she reminds me why.

When she was a toddler, she could never catch up to us, because she was always distracted by every little thing.

"IVY! You're like the Poky Little Puppy! HURRY UP!"

Well, she's still the Poky Little Puppy.

She stops to look at

every

single

thing!

I swear that girl was sent to me to teach me patience...

We finally made it to the bottom, having completed the entire Pyramid Creek Loop, and it had been every bit as cool as I thought it would be!

After the hike, we headed for the Lake as promised.

We spent the afternoon camped out at Reagan Beach,
where the kids played in the water,
and the sand,
and vegged on the beach.
We ended the day at the park,

before we splurged on a very not-cheap (but super yummy) meal at Harrah's!
We headed home at dusk exhausted, but glad to have enjoyed a perfect summer day in Lake Tahoe.

Yep, summer has been good to us this year!

Ayla Jane Child

2011-07-27T23:44:00.000-07:00

Congratulations to Jon's little sister, Jill! She and her husband, Mike, welcomed their new baby girl into the world today! Ayla is their second child- little sister of Mikey- and we are totally bummed that the McGowan's live on the other side of the country, and that we can't be there to share their joy with them!

We're sending our love and well-wishes across the many miles...

WELCOME TO THE WORLD, AYLA!!!

Ivy's Birthday Party

2011-07-27T18:29:00.000-07:00

I can't believe there are only three and a half weeks left until school starts.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Summer has gone by WAY TOO FAST,

AGAIN!

I'm not ready for schedules and homework and early mornings and structure! I like flying by the seat of my pants! If I'm ambitious and I wanna get up and get movin', I can. If I wanna hang around in my jammies til 10, I can!

I LOVE that!

Plus, I had planned to get so many things done this summer, and all of them still need doing!

It seems like we've been crazy busy every day; the kids have had jujitsu, gymnastics, and/or dance in the afternoons, and when we're not busy with one of those three things,

we've been swimming

swimming,

and more swimming.

They swim in the mornings at the gym, in the evenings at Jeff's, or at friends' houses any chance they get!

I'm kind of wishing we had a pool in the backyard, as that would make things infinitely easier and far more convenient for me. Plus, my public fit-throwing would no doubt decrease (but that's another story for a different day)...

Yes, all three of my children love the water, and have spent most of their summer in it, so if we had a pool, that would have definitely made Ivy's birthday party a no-brainer this year.

But sadly, we don't.

So we threw a "Water Party" for her 8th birthday (in my dad's spacious back-yard) instead!

(And yes, this party took place nearly three weeks ago, and not only am I just now sitting down to blog about it, she hasn't sent out a single thank-you note yet! Ugh.)!

I always forget what a pain parties are until I'm throwing one again, but at least this year we were a bit luckier than we've been in some years past, because Jon's parents were still in town! We were so grateful to have all three grandparents there helping with set-up, hosting duties, and clean-up,

And it was still a pain!

BUT

Ivy had a really great day, so of course, in the end, it was totally worth all the hassle!

We had slip 'n slide races,

played Tug of War,

enjoyed some water balloon tossing,

played Pin The Tail on the Donkey,

and spent a lot of time on "free play" too!

Of course there was cake & ice cream after our lunch of hot dogs, chips, and fruit,
and then we wrapped things up with a pinata (because cake & ice cream just wasn't enough sugar; we had to send the kids home with more sugar).
Ivy was a little disappointed that we had run out of time to open presents with everyone, but a few of her friends stayed late to watch her open her gifts,

and the whole day was pretty much a smashing success!

Everyone seemed to have a great time, there were no catastrophic injuries, and Ivy was very happy to have spent such a fun afternoon with her friends!
(I enjoyed hangin' with friends, too)!

And now my sweet little middle child has officially been eight years old for 3 1/2 weeks! (I guess I better start planning her baptism)!

Happy Birthday Ivy! We love you to bits & pieces!

Vacation with Grandparents

2011-07-16T21:19:00.000-07:00

We've already been home from vacation for a week and a half, and our summer has been so busy this year that I am just now sitting down to blog about it!

For the past four years, we have traveled to the Northern California coast to enjoy a cooler 4th of July near the sand, sea, and Redwoods! This year was no exception, but what made this year exceptional is that all of the grandparents were in attendance!

Grandpa Dennis and Grandma Geri came all the way from Utah,

and Grandpa Louie came from half a mile down the street!

FUN!

We were really excited to have all of the grandparents along with us, and I was equally thrilled that Dennis and Geri would finally get to check out a corner of California that Jon and I love so much!

Before we embarked on the lengthy drive North, however, we had a little bit of celebrating to do!

Dennis & Geri arrived in Sacramento on June 30, which also happened to be Ivy's 8th birthday!

We invited the fam and a few of my friends, and headed over to (guess where?) Round Table for pizza, cake, and ice cream!

Ivy had a great day, and I did too!

It was so much fun to see my old and very dear friend, Jaymie Elliott (whom I hadn't seen in 16 years; I was thrilled to be able to squeeze in a visit while she was passing thru town), and Julie and Elizabeth too!

I LOVE reuniting with old friends (thank you, Facebook), and it's always so comforting that no matter how many years pass, we can always pick up right where we left off!

I woke the next morning full of excitement, and spent most of the day preparing for our big trip. I can't tell you how helpful it was to have Grandma around to play with the kids and to keep them occupied while I was packing and cleaning! It made things TEN TIMES easier for me!

On Saturday, July 2, (Dennis's birthday) we began the dreadful trek Northward! We stopped in Willits for gas and snacks, and then again at Fern Canyon for lunch and a quick hike.

Fern Canyon is amazing! The canyon walls almost seem to come alive in the breeze, and a mountain stream runs through the base of it... pretty spectacular!

It was a great place to stretch our legs and take-in some beautiful scenery, but I did hear a few complaints on the way out that we were going home with wet shoes!

Come on! That's part of the adventure!

After a bit more driving, we finally arrived at our destination: Whaleshead Beach Resort in Brookings, Oregon!

We checked into our cabins, and then headed to Whaleshead Restaurant to celebrate Dennis's birthday. Chris and Donna joined us for dinner, and it was fun to chat while enjoying such a great meal! The food was spectacularly good, and after a long, tiring day, it was quite a treat to enjoy such a wonderful meal on the beautiful Oregon coast!

Our cabins each came with an ocean view- and a hot tub on the deck- and even though it was pretty late by the time we returned home from dinner, the kids just couldn't wait to slip into the hot tub!

I have to say, it was pretty great! The view was just amazing, and we were feeling very spoiled with our super cute cabin on the coast! What a vacation!!!

The following morning began with breakfast at the cabin, and then Jon & the kids started a game of Monopoly while I loaded our day-packs with the day's lunch and drinks!

We headed off on foot from the resort, crossed Highway 101 (just like hitch-hikers!), and caught the first trail off Whaleshead Beach.

It was a fairly short walk, probably a mile or so, but it did not disappoint!

The views were fabulous!

Olivia assumed her usual place at the head of the pack, and while Ivy tried to hike with Grandma and me, she soon lost patience and ran up ahead with everyone else. Geri and I brought up the rear, chatting the entire time!

We looped back around to our starting point, and then stopped for lunch at Whaleshead Beach.

Even hiking doesn't seem to motivate this kid to eat; it took forever for him to finish his lunch!

After lunch, we walked along Whaleshead Beach and spent the afternoon chatting, fighting about politics, and enjoying our spectacular surroundings!

After returning from our fabulous day outdoors, the kids scrambled into their bathing suits and raced back out to the hot tub!
Chris and Donna joined us for dinner again, and we bbq'd salmon and chicken out on the deck, with rice, broccoli, corn on the cob, and dinner rolls!

That night, Gage actually ate his dinner, because he'd been dying for a smore since the minute he'd stumbled across the graham crackers & chocolate!

Just like the previous day, we wrapped up the evening with a nice, long, dip in the hot tub!

I so love vacation!

We woke the next morning ready to enjoy all the Crescent City festivities! The City by the Sea begins their 4th of July celebrations with a parade in the morning,

and Dennis was so overcome with excitement about it, we had to keep reminding him to settle down!

I was a tad disappointed with the parade this year, as they were mostly throwing out tootsie rolls and crappy hard candy, instead of the Andes Mints they threw last year!

As always, the parade was festive and fun, and I was proud of Gage for fearlessly running out into the street for candy; a few years ago he'd been too timid to leave the curb!

The Hmong community turned out again this year, so I snapped a few pictures of Jon's people,

and then I got some shots of the local roller derby chicks just for fun!

The parade lasted about an hour, and we had to console Dennis when it was over... he just loves a good parade!

Following the parade, we headed to Enderts Beach Overlook, and enjoyed a picnic lunch in the fog! I was bummed that Dennis & Geri didn't get to see the view, but as usual, they never complained!

Chris & Donna generously offered to lend us their Jeep Wrangler for the afternoon, so Jon and I took his parents on a leisurely drive through Stout Grove, while Donna and Grandpa watched the kids for us.

It had been a few years since Jon and I had walked through the grove, and I appreciated having a few quiet, kid-free minutes together!

I love the Redwoods up there; they're so majestic and serene. I always feel a calmness and tranquility, and I just never want to leave!

After a wind-blown drive back to Chris and Donna's house, we met up with everyone and headed for the beach!

Just like last year, the wind was relentless, so whata ya do when the wind blows?

Yep, we pulled out the kite!

Despite the wind, my dad was somehow able to bbq burgers, so we ate dinner on the beach, and then looked forward to fireworks.

Gage had been so excited to light fireworks, and somehow, we had forgotten to bring them with us! They were sitting in my dad's trunk in Sacramento!

BUMMER!

The kids were pretty disappointed that we didn't even have sparklers, but Chris saved the day with a handful of bottle rockets.

Gage was in kid-heaven!

Jon gave Gage a smoldering stick to use as a lighter, and off Gage went to line up the bottle rockets and launch them over the ocean!

Why are boys such pyromaniacs?

As the sun started to set, it became uncomfortably cold on the beach. We had our propane firepit with us, but with the wind chill, it just couldn't throw out enough heat! We were all pretty cold, but the kids snuggled up, and waited for the fireworks!

None of my pictures turned out, but the fireworks really were amazing! People launch aerial fireworks up and down the beach, and from where we were sitting, there were fireworks on our left, the City display to our right, and aerials being launched right overhead.

Gage said, "Mom! I don't know where to look! Should I look at the beach, or the City?"

It was pretty cool, and even though it was a cold night, I loved it. I'm not so sure that Dennis or Geri or my dad had a great time in the wind and the cold, but we sure did! Gage and Ivy kept talking about "next year" while we were still sitting on the beach!

We returned to the cabin too late and exhausted for hot-tubbing on the 4th, so we showered the kids, and tucked them into bed.

The following morning we headed back to Crescent City to do the lighthouse tour, but once we arrived, the kids decided they'd rather tidepool than walk through the lighthouse, so we split up.

My dad and I tidepooled with the kids, while Jon, Dennis, and Geri did the lighthouse tour.

The tidepools were plentiful this year; we found lots of crabs and star-fish, and Gage & Grandpa kept one-upping each other with their finds. Grandpa said, "Look Gag, it's Crab City. Look at 'em all!"
Then a few minutes later I hear, "Look Grandpa, I found crab country. They're everywhere!"

And that went on until one of them had found crab galaxy...

Gage is finally getting braver in his tidepooling; he picked up a crab large enough to leave marks on his hands with its claws!

After the lighthouse and tidepooling, we went to lunch at Thai House in Crescent City, and then headed for Ocean World.

Jon and I had taken the kids on a tour there a few years ago, but it had been long enough that they were excited to check it out again.

We had just been at the tidepools an hour earlier, but the kids dove right into the touch pool at Ocean World, as most of the critters in there were A LOT bigger than the ones we'd just seen in the wild!

Somehow, our tour guide had selected Gage to be a "volunteer," and actually convinced him to stick his tongue on a sea anemone's tentacle for 20 seconds!

This is the kid who won't eat food to save his life, but he'll stick his tongue on a slimy ocean critter for half a minute?

GAG!

The rest of the tour included an aquarium with fish, sharks, & sea lions,

a shark-petting pool,a sea lion show, and a few photo-ops!Ocean World was a pretty good way to wrap up our Crescent City afternoon, and we headed back up to Brookings immediately afterward.

We spent some time at Harris Beach, but before long, we were all sweating!

The weather was amazing; it was in the mid-80's that day (rare for the area), and we were all in long sleeves, so we decided to run back to the cabin for our bathing suits!

We quickly changed, then went to Whaleshead Beach to enjoy the sun!

The kids did some barefoot rock climbing,

some splashing through the waves,and of course, some wave-jumping! It was a beautiful evening, and really a perfect way to spend our last night on the beach.

We finally headed back to the cabin for a late dinner, and while I prepared our taco/nachos dinner, the rest of the crew relaxed in the hot tub!

Just like always, our vacation had gone by way too quickly, and I was really bummed that this would be our last meal on the ocean!All the adults hung out by the firepit long after the kids had gone to bed, and everyone agreed it had been a good trip!

My dad had definitely been missing Judi a lot, and I felt bad that Dennis & Geri had done so much driving to get there, and I just wasn't sure that the grandparents were having as much fun as we were! I worried that we had worn them out, but I was really glad that they'd been able to come! I just love it there, and I'm always eager to share it with people.

It had been such a great vacation, and so much fun for my kids to have all their grandparents there. Gage told me it was his favorite vacation we've ever had, and when I asked him if he liked it better than Disneyland, he said YES!

I don't know if we'll ever be able take a vacation with all the grandparents like that ever again, so this really was a special trip, and one that I'm sure my kids will always remember.

We got up the next morning, and began packing up, when I realized I hadn't taken many pictures of the cabin! I snapped one last picture of the kids sleeping in the loft before we woke them,

and one more of the view from their loft,
and then it was time to pack up, load up, and head out.

I'm never ready to go back to my regular life; vacation never lasts long enough, but I sure was grateful to have had such a fun and memorable trip.

I think this will be one that I never forget!

Ivy turned 8

2011-07-10T09:46:00.000-07:00

I really can't believe it, and I don't know how enough time has passed for this statement to be true, but my little Ivy is now EIGHT!

EIGHT YEARS OLD!

It's startling and exciting and bittersweet, all at the same time. And because these milestones in their little lives keep coming at me so quickly, I'm able to treasure more of the little moments, as I am continuously reminded that I won't have my kids with me forever.

Pretty soon, they'll be venturing out into the world all on their own, and I'm certain that when that day comes, it will still feel startling, and exciting, and bittersweet, all at the same time!

But here we are right now, with my adorable little middle child already an independent 8-year-old, and I can't help but reflect on my blessings a little.

Ivy has been a dream-come-true for me!

I always wanted a little girl, and when Ivy was born with those big, brown, eyes, perfect olive complexion, soft brown hair, and an eager spirit ready to take on the world, I felt like a life-long prayer had been answered! Here was the perfect little girl I had wanted all my life; and she was so cute!

She was just a beautiful baby! Sweet, cuddly, happy, and completely adorable- I fell in love with her instantly!

Always easy to please and ready for any adventure, she was born with lots of energy and a contagious enthusiasm for life. She smiled early, and never stopped!

Early on in her toddler years, however, we realized she also had a sassy side, as this child could go from zero-to-freak in half a second, (and she can still do so today)! Never one to hide her emotions, I realize now that I am lucky to have such an expressive girl. She may come with a bit of drama, but I never have to worry about any suppressed issues with her. She lets it all out! And most of the time, thankfully, Ivy is spewing out happiness and cheer!

She's always been a happy kid, and has been a GREAT sister from the beginning. She loves Gage, she loves Bug, and she is definitely the peacemaker in my brood.

Her fun-loving and playful personality have always made her popular wherever she goes,
And I can honestly say that this girl brings a smile to my face every, single, day!

She's smart, sweet, thoughtful, caring, generous, strong, tender-hearted, loving, playful, happy, and

just

plain

beautiful.

I love this girl with all of my heart,

and can tell you that being her mother will always be one of the greatest joys and blessings of my life.

Congratulations to you, Ivy, for having reached eight so well. You are beautiful inside and out, and I am honored to be your mom.

I like Obama

2011-06-26T23:00:00.000-07:00

While I have no desire to engage in political posts again, I really just wanted to ask one simple question to anyone who might still be reading this blog.

Why don't you like Obama?

I assume you don't, because most of the readers who used to comment on here were of the conservative variety, and I can further assume you don't like him, because the latest Gallup poll showed 49% of Americans disapproving of Obama's job performance, while only 44% approve.

More people dislike him than like him?

As always, I'm in the minority. That seems to be a running theme in my life no matter where I go, but I just can't figure out why people are so critical of every thing our President attempts to do!

I admit that I know nothing about politics, and even less about economics, but I can give you the thought processes that run through my stay-at-home, soccer-mom mind as I read the CNN crawl when I walk on the treadmill at the gym!

The way I see it, Obama marched into office in January of 2009 to inherit an economic recession at home, and an absolute disaster in the Middle East, mostly caused by George W. Bush's ineptitude. Things were a mess at home and abroad, and I don't understand why people expected Obama to wave a magic wand and instantly make it all better.

Bush had golfed for 8 years to get us to that point. Obama couldn't fix it all overnight!

There had been a series of poor decisions, and bad policy, that would take more than a few years for Obama to straighten out, and here's why I think that:

While Bush did have to respond to the Sept 11 attacks, and while he was right to declare war on Al Qaeda, everything he did after that was wrong.

He was wrong to throw his imperialistic American weight around, declaring that we would create a viable democratic state in Afghanistan. (Yeah. Because thousands of years of deeply ingrained cultural and religious beliefs isn't an insurmountable obstacle to worry about. Let's just establish a new and improved government, from scratch).

Afghanistan was supposed to have been about finding Bin Laden, and all the other high-ranking Al-Qaeda members, and destroying the organization of Al-Qaeda.

Yep. That would have been good. That would have sent the message to the world: Do Not Attack America.

But that's not how it went down.

For some unknown reason, Bush, with all our high-tech American intelligence, was unable to locate Bin Laden. Al Qaeda was harder to dismantle than he thought.

But we had already bombed our way through Afghanistan, blowing things up, destroying infrastructure, and failing to make any real progress against the "terrorists" in the process! Many of the Afghans I saw on the news were the people whose homes we'd destroyed, and the children whose schools had been blown up.

Hmmmm. That's a pickle. I guess we better rebuild what we just destroyed.

But rebuilding isn't good enough. We have to show them how much better our culture is than theirs, so we're gonna establish a brand-new government while we're at it.

Well, things were hardly going swimmingly in Afghanistan, when WHAT? Two years later, Bush is declaring war on IRAQ?

Oh yeah, I forgot! We had to get rid of Saddam and his scary WMD's- that was totally legit. Who cares about the whacko in North Korea who is stockpiling nuclear weapons while the majority of his countrymen are starving to death- and cut off from the rest of the world- we gotta go after Saddam!

Except, there were no WMD's.

Golly, what a big boo-boo our American intelligence made, AGAIN!

Well, I think it was less about Intelligence boo-boo, and more about settling Daddy Bush's score with Saddam, while securing Western access to middle-eastern oil.

But regardless of any of that, here's what Obama walked into, in January of 2009.

A true diasaster in the Middle East. An economic recession at home. A soaring national deficit.

Bush's failed tax-cuts, which had benefitted the wealthy, ultimately caused decreased federal revenue during his reign, and that, coupled with outrageous military spending, had caused a historically high national deficit by the time he left office.

Bush walked out, leaving America entrenched in Iraq and Afghanistan, leaving us with the sub-prime mortgage crisis, and the bank-bailout in response to it... I can't believe Obama was willing to touch any of it with a ten-foot-pole.

Bush wreaked HAVOC on this country. Clinton- a guy I didn't particularly love because of all his zipper issues- had left office with a SURPLUS. In eight years, Bush took us from surplus, to soaring national deficit!

The United States public debt is now over $13 trillion, and continues to grow at a rate of about $5.48 billion each day. The Pentagon recently announced that spending on the Iraq/Afghan occupation has passed the $1 trillion mark.

$1 TRILLION.

HELLO PEOPLE! WHY WERE ALL THE REPUBLICANS SCREAMING THAT OBAMA'S HEALTHCARE PLAN WOULD COST $950 Billion?

All of you would rather bomb the crap out of the Middle East than have access to afforable healthcare?

It's fine to spend $1 trillion in other countries, but not here?

PLEASE HELP ME UNDERSTAND WHAT I AM MISSING!

The economy is still lagging, in spite of what I consider to be valiant efforts on Obama's part to turn things around. He knows we cannot sustain this level of economic hardship. We cannot continue to accumulate debt, and spend wildly beyond our means, and expect to have a functional government for our children's generation.

I know he knows this, because the last two news-worthy events prove to me that he is doing his very best to get this country back on track.

Although we are morally and ethically obligated to rebuild what we destroyed in Afghanistan, WE CANNOT AFFORD THIS WAR, which is why he announced the withdrawal of 33,000 American troops from Afghanistan in the next year. We have to get out! He's trying to get us out!

He also knows that with consumer debt and unemployment at all-time highs, our economy cannot handle higher oil prices, which is why he is releasing 30 million barrels of oil from the reserves. As oil prices go up, we- the little guy- pay the price as everything from food, to prices at the pump, go up. He's trying to cushion the blow!

I don't understand why so many people dislike him. I truly don't. Obama is lookin' out for the little guy, and I cannot for the life of me understand why so many people continue to criticize everything he does.

Does anyone ever talk about the fact that the GM bailout Obama approved worked? Does anyone ever mention that GM is humming along smoothly, that they announced their first quarter 2010 profits, showing revenue at $31.5 billion, and operating income of $1.2 billion?

There's a whole bunch of people in Detroit, who still have jobs, that like Obama.

Maybe I should move to Michigan...

I'm just still confused over the fact that Obama is the guy who ordered Bin Laden to be taken down, Obama is the guy who realizes that Pakistan had been harboring him, and Obama is the one who realizes that Pakistan is anti-American, that we are fighting a losing battle in the Middle East, and that we cannot afford to be so heavily invested in a place we never should have occupied to begin with.

He's trying his darndest to clean up the messes he inherited two and a half years ago. And this middle-class-American mom APPROVES of the job he is doing. WHOLE-HEARTEDLY!

I just hope Gallup polls me next time.

Growing

2011-06-21T23:53:00.000-07:00

Gosh, ya know, I should really just go to bed.

I'm super tired, and it's dreadfully late, but as soon as I close my eyes, it will be time for another day to start, and I'm just not ready for that! I'd rather sit here quietly and savor the last few minutes of alone-time.

Even though I'll probably regret it all day tomorrow...

I've been in such a weird funk these past couple of months. My kids just seem to be growing up so fast; Gage is half-way to adult-hood already, and Ivy is turning 8 in a week! We went to the movie this morning, and I looked over at Gage, two seats down, with his floppy, wild hair everywhere, and I had the distinct memory of taking him to Lord of The Rings when he was an infant.

It just didn't seem like that was nine and a half years ago.

He doesn't seem old enough to refuse a haircut!

And I know that the state of his hair says more about my parenting than anything, but the thing is,

Life is just going WAY too fast!

I keep thinking that I'll paint the bathroom next month, and then next month turns into next season, and five-plus-years later, I still haven't painted the bathroom.

I still haven't finished the kids' baby books. I still haven't done a lot of the things I've meant to get done, and it's all just going by way too fast.

Jon works too much. We both work too hard for "later," and sometimes it feels like I'm missing the "now."

My preemie is nine and a half years old.

My "baby" turned FIVE, five months ago. She'll be starting Kindergarten in two more.

Sometimes it's hard to go to sleep at night, because one of these days when I wake up, it will all be over.

I'm afraid that I won't be happy when I get what I wish for!

When Jon and I are alone again, and we're not stressed about the mortgage anymore, and I'm not coordinating three different schedules for three different kids, and when taking a skiing vacation doesn't break the bank,

I'm afraid I won't be that happy!

I think I'll miss taking the three of them to a matinee on a 100 degree day, and I'll miss watching their dance classes, and I'll miss Gage's squeals in jujitsu, and I'll miss watching them swim. I'll miss complimenting their artwork, and hearing their ideas, and seeing them play.

And motherhood is just such a paradox! Because all of that means that I will go to bed exhausted, every day, and I'll worry that I missed something important, something that I should have done for or with them, and I'll wonder if it's all gonna be okay in the end, in spite of everything I miss.

It means that even though I am deeply proud of all their growth and experiences and accomplishments, I'll always be a little bit sad with each small step they take away from me, and out into the world.

How can your heart swell with pride, and feel so heavy, all at the same time?

Maybe it's okay to stay up late sometimes.

Because late at night, alone, is when I seem to realize that I am one lucky chick.

And I just don't want to miss a minute of it.

End of another school-year

2011-06-12T18:20:00.000-07:00

The kids are out of school!

Friday was their last day, and HALLELUJAH, I am super excited for summer break this year! We don't even really have that much planned; our annual trip North to Crescent City in July, and then a camping trip to Gualala in August, but that's pretty much it!

There's not much on the schedule, and that's a good thing; I am really lookin' forward to some down time!

Maybe I'll scrapbook! Maybe I'll get organized! Maybe I'll clean out some closets, and weed through the bookshelves, and clean the carpets, and wash the windows, and finish Olivia's baby book! Maybe I'll clean out the pantry!

We're gonna have to sneak in a trip to the drive-in movie at some point, and I'm gonna have to get back into some sort of an exercise routine, but there's no rush for any of it,

and that makes me so happy!

I'm just gonna chill awhile...

And blog a little!

So far, June has been A-okay. I still have a little bit of lingering pain from last month's hernia surgery, but I'm slowly getting back to normal. I'm eager to get back to exercising, and I really miss being able to sleep on my side or on my tummy, but every day seems to bring a little less pain, and a little more mobility... I'm starting to think I might actually survive this!

Having been gutted in mid-May, I really slacked on wrapping up the school-year this year. I pretty much only showed up to the things I was maternally obligated to attend! Ivy's class had a "summer birthdays" celebration at school on June 2nd,

Buggy graduated from preschool on June 6th,

(Grandpa treated her to a celebratory lunch afterward at her favorite place: Taco Bell),
And Gage & Ivy wrapped up their school-year on June 10th. They were lucky enough to be invited to a swimming party after school that day, and I can't think of anything they'd rather do to celebrate than swim with their friends!
Yep, another whole school-year gone by...

From August 22, 2010,

To June 10, 2011,and in the blink of an eye, they're already done with another year of their little lives!

Even scarier, in 10 more weeks I'll have a 4th grader, a 3rd grader, and a Kindergartener...

It's all going by way too fast!

And I'm sure Grandpa would agree! He just celebrated his 66th birthday on June 5th.

Gage said,

"Mom, how old is Grandpa now?"

Me: "Sixty six."

Gage: "Poor Grandpa! That is so old!

We celebrated with him and Judi at Mizu,

and even though it was a pretty low-key birthday dinner, he seemed happy with it!

Jon has turned my sweet little Ivy into a sushi lover, and it totally grosses me out.

How many 7-year-olds eat a plate like that?

Ugh. I'd rather starve.

Sixty six must not be too dreadfully old; he still climbs with the grandkids!

We also celebrated Miranda's birthday in June, even though her birthday was actually on May 11th! May had been such a crazy month, that we ended up celebrating her birthday exactly one month late, on June 11th!

Judi and grandpa came too, with Judi's adorable grand-daughters, Paetyn & Presley,

and I'm pretty sure that a good time was had by all!

Better late than never, right?

Happy Birthday, Mir!

And that pretty much brings us up to date! Whew, the blog sure is easier to keep up with when I post more frequently than once a month!

I'm officially on summer break, woo hoo, and I'm off to start my first official summer project: typing our favorite family recipes and saving them in a cute binder!

WELCOME SUMMER!!!

Another Month Gone

2011-05-30T19:56:00.000-07:00

This has been a bizarre month!

I was out-of-commission for more than half of it, and what-a-ya-know, life went on just fine

without me!

Is it possible that no-one needs me as much as I think they do? That's a relief! Perhaps I should drop out of life more often! I think I may have finally caught up on the last 10 years' worth of sleep deprivation!

Actually, on second thought, maybe not. The perk of dropping out of life for two weeks was severely negated by the extreme pain that came along with that deal.

Nope, it wasn't a pleasant rest! But before my mini-health-crisis hit, we did have a little bit of fun!

After school one day, the kids were playing on the preschool equipment for a few minutes, and I had one of those weird flashback moments. It suddenly occurred to me that Bug is about to "graduate" from preschool,

and I realized that it has only been four short years since Gage "graduated!"

Where have the last four years gone? And how is it that my sweet little "Shmoopy"- who once upon a time wore whatever I told him to- has turned into a sloppy, long-haired kid,
who presents me with type-written contracts to sign?
(Apparently he can work the printer, but not spell check)?

I've never been confident in my mothering skills, and maybe I should have refused to sign it, but I decided to err on the side of encouraging his initiative, and gave him what he wanted. Afterall, he really is too big to be called Shmoopy, and since he had forgotten to specify the consequences for breaking the contract, I figured I could play along!

Yep, some days life really does feel like a blur, and I just can't figure out how to slow things down. So I guess I'll just keep trying to document it!

Journal-worthy moments from the past month include Ivy's Girl Scout horse-back riding event,

which, of course, she loved,
and Crazy Hair Day at school (always a favorite)!
Gage wanted to go the fo-hawk route, which I really didn't think was possible, but "Got 2 b Glued" kept those 7-inch spikes up all day! He was quite happy with his look,

And little "Pippy" here was pleased with her silly 'do as well!

Olivia's pre-school class had a field trip to Safetyville that day too, and it took the entire morning to convince her she didn't need crazy hair...
Safetyville is a cute little kid-sized "town" of miniature, fake buildings, and the goal is to teach kids how to navigate through the world safely.

They're taught to always use the sidewalk, to look both ways before crossing a street, how to call 911, how to stop at all rail crossings, and they're reminded to never ride a bike, scooter, or roller blades without a helmet!

Yep, I spent the entire three hours thinking about all the other things I should have been doing...

One of Ivy's BFF's invited her to a Girlfriendz party,
(happy birthday, Manon),

and then before I knew it, Mother's Day was here! Jon had to work that day, so the girls decided to take it upon themselves to make my day special...
by making me a cake!

Jon came home and said, "What the heck is that supposed to be?"
Ya know what? It was awesome! Well, except for the mess, but it's the thought that counts, right?

Monday morning was the Mother's Day celebration at school, which, ironically, reminded me how desperately my mothering skills need to be polished.
I had yelled at Ivy for sticking a giant sticker (and leaving a 7-inch by 5-inch adhesive mess) on my car window that morning, so she had sulked off to class feeling bad, and then when she saw me on the front row at performance time, she cried through the first two songs.

I felt like crap!

I wanted to run up there and give her a huge hug and tell how adorable she is, but she finally perked up on her own, and apparently decided to forgive me.

I totally remember bragging, "I'm a patient person..." That must have been before I gave birth!

Then on May 9th, (dum da da da),

Gager got braces!

It's kinda crazy! And just one more thing that makes him seem more grown up than I want him to be...

Ivy's violin recital was on May 10th, and while it was adorable to watch her perform,
she wasn't as patient when it was time for the other kids to perform their solos...
Jon wasn't long on patience that night either!

On May 14th, Ivy attended another birthday party, this one for her good friend, Kendra! It's sure hard to believe these girls are turning eight already!

Right after that, I went under the knife, and life continued on for everyone else while I consumed copious amounts of percocet, norco, and vicodin (NO, I do NOT tolerate pain well).

Jon and Gage left at 6 a.m. on the morning of my surgery to attend the 3rd grade Point Reyes field trip, and while I was really depressed about having to go through it all without him, Jon had left me in good hands!

My sister flew in from Utah to help me through all of it, and she did an awesome job. If I can't have Jon by my side, my seester is the next best thing!

For some odd reason, though, she allowed Ivy to attend her Girl Scout Water Day in a size five swimming suit (that sure wouldn't have flown if I'd been sober).

Meanwhile, Jon and Gage were battling the elements in Point Reyes (it rained the first day),

and mercifully, Jon was able to check up on me daily by phone!

Apparently the field trip was a huge success! They came home with a tan,

And lots of stories...
and both of them said it was the best field trip yet!
Next year they'll be going to Yosemite, so we'll see how they vote after that one!

Right after Jon and Gage returned from Point Reyes, Janae had to fly home to get back to her own family. I was truly heart-broken to see her go, and even more upset about having to miss the Calaveras trip, but luckily, my dad agreed to go in my place so that Ivy could still attend.

While the scenery there is nothing short of breath-taking,

they were only able to enjoy one day of good weather before the rain hit!
It was really difficult to allow Jon and my dad to pack for a huge trip like that without my supervision... Jon struggles to pick out ONE decent outfit for Ivy; how could he pack four? And who would do her hair? Had they packed enough warm clothing for her?

There was nothing I could do except lay in bed and hope that after 9-plus-years of fatherhood, Jon could figure it out.

And I guess it worked out fine. Even though Ivy's tent had been rained out, and she'd been freezing cold the entire trip, she made it home alive and well.

And luckily for me, I'd been able to lay around for another whole week, because my sister-in-law had come all the way from Crescent City to help out with the kids and the housework!

I honestly don't know what I would have done without Janae and Donna during this whole ordeal; they truly saved my sanity, and allowed me to rest and heal, as they took over my responsibilities for me.

And I was happy that Donna could spend some time with two of her daughters while she was in town.

Here she is with her super cute daughter, Savannah, and her adorable grand-baby, Brenden. At least Donna was able to have a little bit of fun while acting as the live-in maid for a week!

By some miracle, I survived the second half of May, and am still here to tell the story! Today was my first day solo, and it turned out okay, because my dad has been helping out with the kids. He picks them up after school, and drives them to their many afternoon activities, and that has been enormously helpful.

It's been two weeks, today, since I was butchered, and frustratingly, I am still in pain! My post-op appointment is tomorrow, and I can only hope my surgeon will tell me that the pain is normal, and all is well.

I just need to figure out what in the heck happened, so I can prevent this from ever happening to me, ever again!

Here's to June: I'm hoping it's a better- and more painless- month than May!

*I had a follow-up appointment with my McDreamy surgeon today (my sister was completely smitten with Dr. Friedlander), and he informed me that my tissue sample came back benign! It was just a femoral hernia! That's it! No crazy cancerous lymph nodes. I'M NOT GONNA DIE YET!!!

I was so relieved to be getting a clean bill of health, I said, "I'm FINE? I'm totally healthy and normal?" and he says,

"Physically, yes!"

WHAT A BUTT!

He thinks I'm crazy!

And all because I asked him for more percocet (I guess I may have been crying at the time). Well, and maybe because I was a little squeamish when he would go into graphic, gory detail about my dysfunctional innards!

And I might have been a little squeamish while they were prepping me for surgery...

But come ON! I was under durress! This whole unpleasant episode has been STRESSFUL!

Jon says I'm too sensitive, and ya know what? Who cares if McDreamy thinks I'm crazy?

I'm NOT GONNA DIE YET!!!

YAY!

May Days

2011-05-26T21:11:00.000-07:00

Already another month has passed since my last post... this blogging thing is just becoming harder and harder to keep up with.

In the beginning it was so addictive to be reconnecting with old friends, and to have those long-lost friends leaving comments on my blog, validating my rants, and seeming to care about what I had to say!

Me! The frazzled stay-at-home mom with a kind-of-dull existence! Someone would bother to read something I had written?

FUN!

It was so fun to catch up with them, with their families, with where life had taken them now.

Friends! I used to have friends!

Blogging quickly became a thoroughly indulgent pleasure for me, and I just couldn't wait to get back on the computer to post something new, or to read someone else's. Then somewhere along the second year or so, I realized that it truly was taking up way too much of my time.

Guilt started to set in.

The house really was becoming unmanageable. A work-out or two fell by the way-side. I worried I might be Too-Much-Information girl with all this blabbing.

And then someone tattled to my bishop after I posted about a tough week in church one Sunday.

Who all reads this stupid blog?

It got way less fun after that.

Now it's all politically correct talk for me... Yep, the shininess officially wore off.

I gotta keep it clean.

Modest is hottest.

So I began using the blog as pretty much an "update center" for out-of-town friends & family who maybe cared to see what we've been up to.

And it's our family journal.

That's good, I guess. The kids might read it some rainy day, fifty years from now.

I can quit debating gay rights, and whether it's possible for 5-year-olds' to dress immodestly, and just post the family updates.

But it's just not that much fun anymore!

It's harder to find the time to blog nowdays.

And now that I'm a month behind, it'll take more catching up to do than I can possibly achieve at the moment.

So here's the brief update!

May was all about Mother's Day, Ivy's violin recital, Gage's 4-day field trip to Point Reyes National Seashore, Ivy's 3-day field trip to Calaveras Big Trees State Park, and my horribly unpleasant, extremely terrible, no good, very bad hernia surgery, which I am still not fully recovered from.

Maybe not even partially. I have two incisions on each side, and between my c-section scars and my hernia repairs, I look like a survivor from a crazed-lunatic-knife attack.

Poor Jon.

I guess it's a good thing he didn't marry me for my looks. The few things I ever had going for me seem to be slipping, fast!

I'll be back soon to post all the gory details and infinite photos of the aforementioned events, and I bet both of you are on pins and needles in the meantime!

Perspective

2011-05-26T01:20:00.000-07:00

Life has an interesting way of putting things into perspective sometimes.

In April, after a routine visit to the gynecologist, it was discovered that I had a lump in my groin, on the right side. After a litany of appointments, ultrasounds, blood tests, and professional opinions, there was still no solid diagnosis, but surgery was finally scheduled.

My surgeon told me he thought it was most likely a hernia, and prepared to do a hernia repair. Surgery was scheduled for Tuesday, May 17. At my pre-op appointment on Monday, he told me the third ultrasound had revealed a small hernia on the left side as well, so we should treat both, which meant an incision on each side.

No biggie. I can handle that. Especially considering what I'd been through in the four weeks prior to that pre-op appointment.

At the beginning of this medical odyssey, my gynecologist had said it was one of two things: lymphoma, or a hernia.

Having lost my mom to lymphoma, I became paranoid in about a milli-second.

All three ultrasound techs had reported the lump as a "cyst with irregularity." A physician's assistant suspected lymphoma, and the surgeon was leaning toward hernia.

Needless to say, it had been a difficult month. Being told different things by different providers was hugely stressful, not to mention confusing. Is this the technological age, or not? How hard can this thing be to identify?

Well, when you have crappy insurance, very. The American healthcare system revolves around one thing: the almighty dollar, and I have just spent six weeks living with that reality.

At one point, I truly thought that I might be diagnosed with cancer, and I just can't tell you the range of emotions that consumed me!

After the initial shock and anger, (and reassurances by Jon that it would be treatable and no-big-deal), I started thinking,

I knew it.

I've been waiting all along for the axe to fall. I always knew that tragedy was right around the corner. For all my constant complaining about life, I've never had a single thing to legitimately complain about.

Jon was and is the love of my life. My three children were born perfect. I live a middle-class-suburban-housewife existence that I always craved and hoped for.

And I was crazy to think that this mundane little routine I am constantly whining about could last forever.

No-one is lucky enough to have it all for very long.

And since losing my mom, I've been keenly aware that none of us is getting out of here alive.

Why haven't I used my time more wisely?

How are Jon and the kids going to get through this?

No-one will remember me five years after I'm gone.

Of course I couldn't say any of that out loud; I'm already accused of being a drama queen for uttering much less than that. But that's generally where my inner dialogue was, for what felt like months, but was actually only 3 days.

During those three days, everything had changed. The trees on the side of the road seemed greener. Every person I passed seemed lucky. My kids had morphed from miniature nuisances, to priceless treasures. Olivia's features were angelic, Gage's statements completely genius, and Ivy's eager smile, perfect. Miracles. All three of them were perfect little miracles.

And Jon.

What had I ever done to deserve him?

There are so many things I love about him!

His fun-loving, magnetic personality and super hot build had attracted me at first, but I lingered because his sense of humor, work ethic, deep loyalty, and unwavering sense of commitment had stolen my heart.

He was my favorite guy!

So I married him.

And this whole time, I've realized how lucky I am that I did. I've never regretted or taken for granted the fact that I super scored in the husband department... we've been best friends for 15 years, and we still are!

What I have taken for granted is that we will always be together.

We're supposed to raise our kids together, and pay off our house, and travel, and have grandkids, and ski until we're 80.

We're supposed to argue about whether our retirement home will be in Tahoe or on the coast.

We're supposed to get old and wrinkly and saggy and gray together.

I don't want him to do all that with someone else!

I don't want my kids to lose their mom.

And then I went in for surgery, still unsure whether they would be excising a cancerous tumor, or whether it would be a simple hernia repair.

Luckily for me, it was the latter.

Which is weird. I was kind of under the impression that hernias occur in fat, out-of-shape, old men. And I have no idea how or when I injured myself.

But there we are.

Eleven days ago, they performed a double hernia repair on me, sent the extracted tissue to pathology (as is standard protocol), and sent me home to recover.

And it's been a long, sucky, painful recovery, but I am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel. I finally believe that the worst is behind me.

And now I'm sitting home in pain- but cancer-free- just hoping that I will remember for a very long time how truly lucky I am.

Disaster didn't strike.

And I hope that I never forget to be grateful, ever again.

Springtime

2011-04-28T17:53:00.000-07:00

I really shouldn't let so much time pass between posts.

I'm so far behind that I hardly know where to begin, and because springtime is always a complete BLUR around here, I should have known better.

Everything piles up when you're not careful!

Does life ever slow down?

Will there ever be a day that I don't feel exhausted, overwhelmed, and completely behind on everything?

SIGH!

Alright, here's an attempt at updating the Child family journal!

Gage began working on his science project in March, which consisted of obtaining bacteria samples throughout his school, and then growing the colonies in petri dishes. (I talked him out of swabbing our house. I just didn't think I could handle the results).

It was quite the project, complete with preparing sterile dishes with Agar, (Jon and I helped a little during this part of the procedure, improvising a bit, as we don't have an autoclave in our house).

And then collecting samples throughout the school:

Phase two of the project was to grow the samples in an incubator at 90 degrees.

(a little more improvising, since we don't have a science lab in our house, either).

Then, after 36 hours had passed, Gage pulled the petri dishes out of the incubator and checked for colony growth.

He found some!

It turns out, the office door-handle is the dirtiest place in the school. Kanai's hand and Emily's desk both had some funky stuff goin' on too, but the dirtiest place in the classroom was the computer mouse.

Gage's hypothesis had been that the toilet would be the dirtiest, but he was wrong. The office door handle was flat out scary!

So there you have it. A third grader has backed up mountains of scientific research: the palms of your kids' hands are FILTHY.

While Gage was growing microbes in my house, Ivy was creating a diorama of her favorite book: Ivy & Bean.

And while the kids and I were engrossed in their projects, Olivia was off tending to her favorite project: Watson.

Just in case you can't see them, the stickers on her ears are frowny-faces (at least Bug got that right), and the sticker on Watson's back says, "Consider Yourself Hugged."

Yep, I'm sure Watson was feelin' the love...

On March 31, Gage's 3rd grade class had a two-day "Pioneer Days" celebration. Each student was assigned a "Pioneer" name, and the class spent the preceding few weeks researching facts about pioneer life during the 1800's.

My little pioneer was a character known as "Chester," and while his parents' names were Jon and Mary (what a coincidence), Chester was an only child! The family had originally emigrated from Italy, and luckily, Chester's father had struck it rich during the gold rush. Now they were all living a privileged life in California...

I bet Mary had a maid and a chef. And maybe even a gardener.

She must have been a cheerful woman...

His class visited Old Sacramento's historic schoolhouse on the first day,

where they learned all about the one-room school houses that were typical throughout America during the 1800's.

We could've watched an episode of Little House On The Prarie and achieved the same result, but hey, field trips are more fun than sitting in school.

The second pioneer day was spent on a ranch, where the kids participated in pioneer activities such as churning cream, making candles, wood-working, and subsisting on "pioneer food."

Is it just me, or does this Chester character look more like an orphan than a rich gold miner's son?

They must not have had barbers back then...

On April 1st, we celebrated the end of Pioneer Days with a trip to the pool, where the kids enjoyed their first swim of 2011!

And where did the month of April go? The first two weeks were spent finishing up projects, and running around to all the usual activities...

Then, by mid-April, it was time (mercifully) to wrap things up at school for Spring Break. Of course, in typical Child-family-fashion, we experienced a little bit of drama around here before that could happen.

Olivia went to school on Wednesday the 13th, but was immediately sent home because they suspected she had Pink Eye.

Really?

I knew it wasn't pink eye. To begin with, it didn't look like Pink Eye, and there was no discharge, and no mucous. I told her teacher I thought it was a sty, but because there had been another student with Pink Eye earlier in the week, many of the moms were in freak out mode.

So I had to take Olivia to the doctor, so she could be admitted back to school in time for the Spring Party on Friday.

What a pain.

We sat in the waiting room for 55 minutes, before the doctor called us in, and told me it was a sty.

I was so irritated.

I obtained a note stating that she was NOT afflicted with Pink Eye, and that her condition was NOT contagious.

And I guess it was worth the hassle. Afterall, she wouldn't have wanted to miss that Spring Party!

Before school paused for Spring Break, the kids' classrooms had an Open House, where they showed off all their hard work during the semester.

Gage received a lot of compliments on his science project, and I was really, really proud of him. He really had done a great job, and he had done so much of it on his own! It was really gratifying to see him work hard, and get such an awesome end-result.

Gage is such an easy kid to be proud of! I love that little guy!

Ivy's projects were well-done too, and she is also an easy kid to be proud of! She's independent and resourceful, and that chick brings such a smile to my face every, single, day!

She would be proud to be a 27-year-old waitress!School was out from April 18-22, and even though we stayed home for Spring Break this year, we kept pretty busy!

Ivy participated in Cheer Camp at Fliptastic, and LOVED it!

She also attended a girl scout PJ party, gymnastics in the afternoons, and her Brownie Easter Party on the 20th.

The week-end rolled around, and it was finally time for Easter!

Remember how fun Easter was when you were a kid?

Coloring eggs, hunting for plastic ones, lots and lots of chocolate and treats...

It's not as fun when you're the mom...

Nope. Sometimes the mess just feels like WAY more trouble than it's worth! I really grumbled this year while cleaning up the Easter mess on Monday morning, but I look at these kids, and I know it won't be very many more years of Easter mess, or any other mess.

They're growing up right before my very eyes, and ya know what? I'm so lucky!

Life is messy, and hard, and overwhelming, and exhausting. It's all of those things. Regularly. But it's also deeply fulfilling.

Yep, I'm one lucky chick, for sure!

Hoppy Easter

2011-04-15T22:46:00.000-07:00

Somebunny stopped by the preschool today, And 20 little kids came scurrying over, and while Buggy professed her love for that bunny three times, she never even knew that the big, dumb, bunny loves her enough to climb into a giant, hot, suit, and hop around like a lunatic!

Someday when she reads this, she will...

(for amusing video footage, visit my Facebook page)!http://www.facebook.com/mary.lema.child

Cherry Blossom Festival - 2011

2011-04-11T09:52:00.000-07:00

Although Jon tries to deny it, I tell everyone that he has a love-affair going with all-things-Asian.

It pretty much started in 2004, when Jon became employed as a full-time retail pharmacist at Longs Drugs. He was hired to be the pharmacy manager, and the location was considered a "problem store."

That would be putting it mildly.

Hmmm, I don't know how to tell this story in a politically correct manner, so if you are easily offended, stop reading now.

The pharmacy was staffed with 4 Caucasian women, one Hmong girl, one Hmong guy, a Vietnamese girl, and Jon. The clientele that frequented the pharmacy was made up of mostly black or white ghetto, and old people!

Jon's daily lamenting included the fact that ghetto people are impatient, rude, hostile, and dishonest, old people are frequently confused and irritable, and his Caucasian staff was ineffective and inept! His saving grace was that all of the Asians in his pharmacy were extremely competent, professional, and efficient. They were the only reason he could get through his work-day!

He attempted to "re-train" the ineffective portion of his staff, which included numerous tutorials, cheat-sheets, verbal reviews, and eventually, write-ups! But as Jon kept failing to help them perform satisfactorily, the less-effective staff began to see their hours cut back. One by one, they started looking for other work, and guess what happened?

As each Caucasian person left the pharmacy, coincidentally, they would be replaced by an Asian person!

Interesting.

As I pointed this out to Jon, he denied any questionable intent! He simply said that he chose the best applicants for the job, and they just happened to be of Asian ethnicity. (I think that fact is what made them the "best applicants," but whatever. Jon adamantly denies it, so I'll let him stick to his story).

The funny thing is that when Jon left the pharmacy last December, the supporting staff consisted of one Caucasian, two Korean, three Hmong, and two Vietnamese employees. But, of course, that's just a coincidence!

Also coincidental, I suppose, is that Jon has since developed a hankering for sushi, pho, clay pot, and a whole bunch of other Asian dishes that make me squirm, like the uber-stinky Vietnamese sandwiches he regularly inhales!

He still talks about our “vacation” to Japan (never gonna happen), and asked me a few months ago if he could accompany his friend on his next trip to Vietnam.

What?

We shop in "little Saigon" a few times a year now, we have sushi-making instruments tucked around our kitchen, and we have been the only white people in the restaurant more times than I care to admit!

Yes, that's all coincidence.

And in spite of the fact that Jon doesn't have a love-affair going with all things Asian, we were planning to attend Chinese New Year in San Francisco this past February, but couldn’t because of his new job.

So we went to the next best thing: The Cherry Blossom Festival in Japan Town!

And actually, the festival continues through next week-end too, with a big parade at the grand finale, but Jon will be working. So it was now-or-never, and we decided to venture West last Saturday, to check out Japan Town's biggest celebration of the year!

We drove from Sacramento to Berkeley, parked at the North Berkeley BART station, and then hopped on the subway.

It was the first time our kids had been on BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit), and all three of them were excited!

From Berkeley, we rode BART into San Francisco, and proceeded to walk about 14 blocks to Japan Town.

Although we take our kids on a lot of hikes and walks, I was a little nervous about this adventure, because it would definitely be the most walking Olivia had ever done.

Once we arrived, there were plenty of things to see and do!

We watched the Japanese dancers (even though the accompanying music was ear-splittingly intolerable),

toured Japan Center,

and enjoyed the sights, sounds, and smells of the festival.

Everything went smoothly until we tried to decide where to go for lunch. Jon insisted on having authentic sushi; afterall, he had traveled all the way to San Francisco! He couldn't hang out in Japan Town without eating sushi.

But, sushi is something I just can't do... and neither can Gage.

So we split up.

Jon and Ivy went for sushi, and Gage, Bug, and I went to

Burger King.

We walked around Japan Town a bit more after lunch, but left before the Jujitsu demonstrations began, as Gage had finally reached his limit. The poor kid was having a seriously tough time coping. He'd been fighting a cold during the previous two days, and even though we were hoping he'd have enough energy to make it through the day, it just didn't happen.

We headed back toward the BART station, but took a few breaks to rest along the way.

The girls had a great time at a park,

and Gage finally perked up a bit when we made a prolonged stop in the San Francisco Public Library.

He applied for a library card,

and plopped down in front of a computer to play games.

The kids and I hung out in the spacious kids area,

while Jon explored the 5 story library.

We wrapped up the day at a Chinese restaurant on Market Street, and then wrangled the brood back to the BART station.

We'd barely been on the train for 5 minutes, and Olivia was passed out cold on my lap!

All in all, our day in San Francisco was a pretty fun adventure,

And all of us slept in the next day...

No Dram-icles

2011-04-04T21:20:00.001-07:00

Okay, I finally got around to watching last week's DVR'd Grey's Anatomy, and WHAT THE HECK?

I barely made it through the episode!

I'd been on the edge of my seat in anticipation after Callie's & Arizona's car accident.

Who would be injured? How serious would it be? Would one of them die? Would Callie lose the baby?

There were any number of things that could happen, and in the opening scene, Callie is lying across the hood of the car, while her disembodied "spirit" is looking on, and she begins

singing.

WHAT? How LAME was that?

Whatever, it's a drama. And Torres does have a great voice. I can suck it up for the first few minutes.

BUT WAIT! IT NEVER STOPS!

They get her into the ER, and then Hunt chimes in for the duet.

WHAT?

Breaking into song amid crisis? Come on! I know it was for dramatic effect, and Grey's has been no stranger to ridiculousness in the past, but this was seriously over the top.

Seriously!

It was SO distracting, and SO ANNOYING.

And yet, I couldn't stop watching.

I had to find out if they would kill her character off. Or if she would lose the baby. Or if Sloan would hit Robbins (like I have wanted to so many times).

And of course, all of them are all sleeping with each other, only this time, they're doing it to music.

LAME! SO, SO LAME!

That's it. Brothers & Sisters better be back on. I can't take much more Grey's...

March-ing on

2011-03-24T15:49:00.000-07:00

March was a whirlwind month: we've had field trips and cookie deadlines and houseguests and car repairs and vomit and science projects and lots and lots of drama... yep, pretty much the same ol' stuff.

Tons to blog about, but no time or real desire to actually sit down and type any of it.

Writers block? Irritable Mare Syndrome?

I have kinda been feeling like I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown lately- more so than my typical feelings of nervous-breakdown-ness that is. I freaked out on Jon for not immediately answering my texts precisely the way I wanted him to, I threw my kids toys in the garbage for not picking up their rooms before bedtime, and I almost demanded a free future brow wax from the lady who missed too many of the peripheral hairs around my eyebrows. I'm Portuguese, Lady! And DARK! There's hair everywhere! Make sure you get all of it, or you can charge me half the price for half the job you did.

Except, I didn't yell at the wax lady. I just paid, and tipped her, and left. Like all good Christian women, I save my best rants for my loved ones.

Yep, I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that I am a control freak, when all this time I've been wondering why so many other people are incredibly thoughtless... can it be me?

Hmmmm, I better not dwell on that one too long. It's much easier to complain about everyone else and their issues...

Alright, in the last month since I've posted, here's what's gone on!

Ivy's gymnastics class had some sort of performance/award ceremony, and even though she was tickled pink with the ribbon she received, I'm pretty sure it was just a glorified photo-op so that parents will keep spending their money there.

It worked. Ivy and Bug are both plugging along in their twice-weekly classes, and even though I have no delusions about either of them ever being real athletes, it's good exercise, and good photo-ops, right? (And who doesn't love coach Izzy)?

I haven't stopped complaining about the parent-participation requirements at the kids schools, but ya know what?

My kids really do attend great schools. (See, I can say something positive even when I'm grumpy. And if I waited to blog until I wasn't grumpy, well, you might not hear from me anymore).

Besides, my dad worked two of my classroom gigs for me this week, so I do get some breaks. Sort of. He worked for me while I stayed home with a puking husband and a puking Bug... so it wasn't really a break, but it did take a few things off my plate this week, and YEP, I can be grateful for that!

Bug went in for her Kindergarten physical and shots this month, and because she has older siblings who recounted their horror stories of their pre-Kindergarten ordeals, she was not a very willing patient. I think she handled the first half of her visit with stoic bravery, but as soon as the injections started, well, let's just say that the entire building can verify that her lungs work just fine!

As soon as we got home, the Child household "pecking order" manifested itself when Watson came cowering through the kitchen like this:

I routinely chastise Bug for tormenting the cat, but Olivia's response was that Watson just didn't know she wanted to play dress-up. Bug was sure that once Watson was all done, the cat would be happy with her makeover of stickers, necklaces, and bikini tops...

Having kids in great schools means they are always going on some field trip, somewhere, and I am frequently obligated to tag along...

In addition to school-related activities, February and March were all about Girl Scout Cookies! I somehow agreed (reluctantly) to be the troop cookie Mama, so that took a bit of time and energy, and I am greatly relieved to have officially wrapped up all my cookie duties today!

We also had back-to-back houseguests for an eleven day period this month, and while I am always excited to hang with family, I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I was stressed and exhausted by the end of it!

Chris and Donna came for four days from Crescent City, and because they have hosted us numerous times, I was glad to finally be able to return the favor. I even allowed their two bischons to attend (we have a rigid no-dog rule at our house), because their pet sitter had backed out at the last minute.

My kids do love Daisy and Rascal, and Chris and Donna have generously boarded my "wild" family countless times, so I gave them one freebie! But next time, any canines showing up at my house will get kenneled here in Sacramento. PERIOD!

We enjoyed a quick visit with Chris & Donna, squeezing in a few trips to our favorite restaurants (Eastern Empire & Waffle Barn) before they left on Monday, and then Brett & Jamie arrived on Tuesday.

The kids were excited to spend some time with their Utah cousins, and baby Owen was a particular hit! All the kids had a great time playing with each other, but because it stormed during their entire visit, and my kids were in school, and Brett was in San Francisco on business for four days, and Owen & Austin got sick, and then Olivia and Jon got sick, the visit was a bit more stressful than I anticipated!

We enjoyed an afternoon at the Science & Space Museum, and another one at Chuck E. Cheese, but were pretty house-bound for the rest of the week. And then the vomit started...

Owen was the first to puke; around Thursday-ish, and then by Sunday afternoon, Austin was hurling. Olivia began vomiting (from Ivy's top bunk) on Sunday night, and between Olivia's & Austin's hurling in the girls room, I rented a rug doctor on Monday morning in a vain attempt to save the carpet.

Sadly, however, regurgitated Froot Loops are resistant to Oxy Clean, Resolve, Comet, and bleach. I think I may now have a rigid "No Froot Loop" rule at my house as well.

To All Who Enter The Child Home: No Dogs, No Froot Loops.

Jon had the gall to complain that I was more worried about puke stains on the carpet than I was about him, and as he was dictating his last will and testament to me from our bed, I was washing puke off the girls hamper, and bunk bed stairs.

He was right. I was definitely more worried about the carpet. And maybe I should have been a bit more sympathetic to his plight, but I vomited my way through three pregnancies. I knew he'd survive a couple of days.

And besides, I wasn't totally certain he was sick anyway. I wanted to fall into bed for the rest of the day and whine about life too! Loads of laundry and sheets and towels and comforters and rug doctoring was most unpleasant.

Jon only missed two days of work, and Ivy missed one day of school, but Bug was laid up for four days; we are all just now returning to the land of the living!

Time to get working on Gage's science experiment (he's doing bacteria swabs throughout our house and growing the samples in petri dishes, 'cause that's not gonna upset me or anything), and Ivy's diorama, and my memory book page covers, and everything else that keeps us running around all the time.

Yes, life is busy, and sometimes it really BLOWS, but we're all still in one piece, and that's the important thing!

Olivia will be leaving for college in 13 years; I can sleep then. For now, I'm just gonna keep trudgin'... and smilin'.... it's all good...

Dad does all the work

2011-03-10T07:17:00.000-08:00

I worked in Ivy's classroom this afternoon (after having spent 90 minutes in Gage's classroom this morning), and an interesting little conversation took place among the 2nd graders!

For some reason during math groups, I refrenced my prior stint as a waitress, and one of Ivy's fellow classmates said, "Hey! My mom used to be a waitress, too!"

Other kid: "What does your mom do now?"

Kid: "Nothing. She just stays home all day."

Ivy: "Yeah. That's what my mom does too."

Kid: "My dad does all the work."

Ivy: "Yeah, my dad does too."

MY DAD DOES ALL THE WORK?

I am SO unappreciated...

Thank Goodness for Charlie Sheen

2011-03-03T13:07:00.000-08:00

I know the guy is crazy, and his interviews are barely tolerable, but hooray for Charlie Sheen! He has provided the perfect example for me to show my children:

This man is the reason you should never do drugs!

He's crazy, delusional, selfish, and self-destructive!

My heart goes out to his own children, but he sure is providing a valuable lesson for mine...

Thanks, Charlie, you non-addict, you!

Love those Logan Ladies

2011-02-22T16:36:00.001-08:00

Despite my anti-social and slightly reclusive tendencies, I actually ventured out on a girls' retreat with my old USU roomies this past week-end, and OH MY GOSH!

It was so much fun!

Good for the heart, good for the soul, good for some laughs!

And I learned so many things!

I can still share a room with Steph & Ang, and we can still talk until 5 in the morning.

Green olives are edible if you hide them in quiche.

The "Perfects" aren't really perfect; some of them have even committed misdemeanors.

People still write checks in the Target check-out line.

And even if you're in the habit of showing up late to the party- and of sometimes putting your foot in your mouth- people will like you anyway!

So you should totally get to know the women on your block; I'm sure they'll be great girls!

And ya know what? No matter how bad my day gets, I've never, ever had to put my poop in a back-pack... it's all gonna be okay!

Emily, Molly, Diane, Becky, Angie, Steph,

and all the other beautiful ladies I spent my week-end with...

I TOTALLY LOVE YOUR GUTS!

Thanks for the memories!

It was a week-end I'll never forget!

Already February

2011-02-13T10:26:00.000-08:00

I hate it when I get this far behind on the blog!

Even though I'm pretty sure that only a handful of people even read this anymore, I still try to document as much of the nitty-gritty of Child family life as I can, because I print these posts and keep them as our family journal.

And, for the few out-of-staters like Geri and Jamie and Jill, I like to think that the blog keeps them in the loop, so here we go. We're half-way through February, and here's what's happened during the last 3 weeks!

On January 24th, Gage was "Star of the Week" at school, so he brought his lizard (Kramer) in for sharing.

For some inexplicable reason, all the kids loved Kramer. Even the girls!

Ooooooooo. I still haven't even touched it yet.

Gage loved showing off his smelly reptilian pet, and it was really fun to watch him be the man of the hour! He's normally so shy and reserved at school, that watching this really did his Mama's heart good!

Take a good look at his beloved hair, because it was about to be chopped off!

Pajama day fell on the last day of Gage's star week,

so he frumped to school in his pajamas, and brought Watson along for his grand finale sharing.

Watson didn't have much fun,

but all the kids loved her!

Watson was a good note to end a very good week on! Gage's stint as star of the week turned out to be a pretty great experience for him.

Me too!

Ivy & Buggy were very excited to head to school in their PJs,

and Bug's class even had a delicious scrambled egg breakfast for everyone to enjoy!

I made it to her class just in time to catch them singing- which is always cute- but I was very confused by this freaked out doll on Miss Nancy's lap!

Why would someone make a girl doll with a scary receeding hairline like that? And why is no-one else freaked out by it? Miss Nancy was all smiles- she even refers to it as "Lucy"- but I kept a close eye on that thing to make sure it wasn't going to come alive like Chucky.

The very next day, Jon dragged Gage into the barber and lopped all of his hair off. I had given CLEAR instructions to get a before and after picture, but Jon did not comply. He claims that Gage was too distraught to pose. Whatever.

The following week was Olivia's 5th birthday,

and while she did have a happy one, I know I'm never going to forget that her 5th birthday was a horribly tragic day for another family closeby. The whole thing is still just so upsetting and awful. It's really hard to even think about.

Given her age, and therefore her natural self-involvement, Olivia didn't seem to realize that I was so distracted and upset that day.

She enjoyed being serenaded by her class- especially relishing the five hip-hip-hoorays-

and she was lucky to be granted her birthday wish later that evening: the fam gathered at Taco Bell for her birthday dinner!

It was kinda weird, and hugely embarrassing, but pretty cute that Olivia was so happy!

I hear that a few people might disagree, but I think Lema's are pretty cool! I mean, how many other people would show up for a birthday dinner at Taco Bell? They all must really love my Bug a lot!

After our gourmet meal, we headed home for cake & ice cream,

and Olivia had a great time blowing out her candles and opening presents!

Then four days later, on February 6, I turned 36.

Ouch. I'm totally old now.

The fam gathered together for the occasion and we had a birthday party at Round Table, which felt strange, since Janae wasn't there. I grew up celebrating Janae's birthday at Round Table, and never had one of my own there, but I have to say that the pizza was pretty yummy, and so was the cake! Judi had baked a chocolate cake from scratch, and it was De-lish!

After my birthday, Sacramento enjoyed a crazy weird heat-wave!

Okay, it wasn't really a heat wave, but it did hit 72 this day, so the kids strapped on their suits and pulled out the hose and super soakers.

It was weird to see them running around in bathing suits the week before Valentine's Day!

The weather hasn't been the only weird thing around here lately! It has really thrown me for a loop that my "baby" is five. I'm genuinely sad about it, and I think I might even be going through some sort of weird depression. I pulled out my camera in Winco last week, because she was being so cute and helpful, and I realized that in 6 short months, she'll be going to school every day.

I'll be shopping in Winco alone, just like I always wanted.

Or so I thought.

Now that my solo shopping trips are almost here, I'm sad!

It just feels like it's all going by way too fast. And I'm always too busy to enjoy it like I should.

I'm trying to savor the little moments more, but there's just never enough time. The best I can hope for is to snap a picture and jot down my thoughts. And say that even though I yell a lot, and rush through every task, and push them out the door complaining the entire time that we are late, I do have many moments of deep, pure, joy.

I wouldn't change any of it.

And I've felt that way for awhile.

I super scored with Jon. He's pretty great, and I think he likes me a lot, and when I step far enough back to take a look at the the big picture, it brings tears to my eyes.

And joy to my heart.

And I really wouldn't change a single thing.

I don't hate Gwyneth

2011-02-07T12:03:00.001-08:00

People are so stupid!

It is seriously becoming difficult for me to possess a hotmail account, because I am continually subjected to the ridiculous msn "headlines" each time I fire up my computer!

Today's nugget: "Why everyone hates Gwyneth."

What?

I shouldn't have wasted any time reading it, but I did.

The gist of the article is that Gwyneth Paltrow is hated for being taller, blonder, and richer than us. (Don't forget that genetics was kind to her intellectually as well; the woman has been speaking Spanish fluently since the age of 15). Apparently, we all hate her for being better than we are in every conceivable way.

Except that I don't.

Check out this excerpt from the article:

"That's pretty much Gwyneth in a nutshell.

She gets standing ovations for doing stuff that isn't even her real job while the rest of us get our cars repossessed and drip pizza grease on our 4-year-old Target T-shirts.

It's that appearance of endless ease, whether true or not, that riles so. Like Martha Stewart before she went to jail and loosened up, she seems to have not a single crack in her patrician façade.

Even Hollywood's other reigning ice queen, Nicole Kidman, went through a very public divorce and wound up watching her new husband bounce right into rehab.

Paltrow has never been caught snorting coke off a hooker, trashing a hotel room, or doing anything more horrible than starring in 'View From the Top.'

She seems to swan through life with that closed-mouthed smile fixed on her angelic face, collecting Oscars, Burberry trench coats, and ovations as her due. It's easy to see why Kathy Griffin famously referred to her as a big bag of BS."

Actually it's not. And not just because I don't know who Kathy Griffin is.

I do know who Gwyneth Paltrow is. She's the chick who named her baby Apple. Isn't that enough proof that truly, no-one is perfect?

It strikes me as odd that Americans spend so much time watching people run around Hollywood, and wishing they could be like them. It's a little weird, since no-one in Hollywood is any happier than the rest of us.

Gwyneth is thin because she has a chef to prepare her nutritionally sound meals every day, and a trainer who helps her work out. I personally wouldn't describe eating right and exercising regularly with the phrase "endless ease." It's actually pretty difficult and requires extreme self-discipline coupled with hard work. Which is why so many Americans don't look like Gwyneth.

It's easier to just hate her.

And maybe it's because my car hasn't been repossessed (I don't finance vehicles), and I didn't drip pizza grease on my 4-year old Target T-shirt. It's more like 6-years-old for me, but that's only because I hate to shop. And there are no grease stains on my cheap, out-of-date clothes, because I only eat pizza when it's socially awkward not to. Pizza isn't calorie-worthy. And I genuinely like shopping at Target. It beats Walmart. And all of those decisions are mine to make; it didn't occur to me that I might be hated for making any of them.

Nope, I really don't hate Gwyneth Paltrow. I don't feel anything toward her, actually, beyond the typical regard that I feel for most other human beings on the planet. I may agree that she is overpaid, but ultimately, that is average Joe American's fault. If the little guy didn't endlessly worship and glamorize Hollywood, there wouldn't be an industry full of overpaid people for us to hate.

Besides, Gwyneth doesn't strike me as trashy, like so many other badly behaved, overpaid women in Hollywood.

I think I might actually like her. I mean, I've never snorted coke off a hooker or trashed a hotel room either. But I have spent countless hours in the gym after childbirth. I can relate to the chick.

And I certainly don't hate her for being taller, blonder, and richer than me. In fact, I am certain I would never have realized I am so woe-fully inadequate if msn hadn't pointed it out to me. I might spend the rest of the day fretting that I am not as good as Gwyneth, but oh yeah! It's 2:25!

Back to reality, and off to pick up the rugrats from school! Then we'll go to jujitsu, practice violin, cook a healthy dinner, read, do homework together, take baths, and go to bed, so that we can all get enough rest for tomorrow's equally busy day.

I just hope I remember during the shuffle to teach my darling, over-privileged children that decent people don't hate other decent people for working hard and achieving success in life.

They congratulate them.

February 2, 2011

2011-02-04T23:47:00.000-08:00

Wednesday was Olivia's birthday, and it was kind of a biggie.

She turned 5. Which, for me anyway, has been the official end of toddler-hood and the beginning of "kid" life. Five has always felt like a pretty big milestone birthday for my kids.

But because we'd had such a busy holiday season, and an equally busy January, we decided not to throw a "friend" birthday party for her this year. We had debated between having the family meet at Chuck E Cheese or John's Incredible Pizza, and then Jon came up with the novel idea of asking BUG where she wanted to go for her birthday dinner.

She picked Taco Bell.

So that's where we went. My saintly family sucked it up, and met us at Taco Bell for dinner! It was actually pretty cute, and it made me realize they must really love her a lot to eat that for dinner!

Olivia had a great time, ingested a couple of cheese roll-ups, and then we all went home for cake, ice cream, and presents.

It would have been just any other day; like any other birthday, with a happy, spoiled kid at the end of it going to bed with a smile on their face.

And Olivia did go to bed with a smile on her face that night.

But it wasn't just any other day.

As I was safely at home, pulling chicken nuggets out of my oven at 10:30 in the morning to prepare for preschool snack, our friend's husband and father was being fatally shot.

As I was fumbling around with cupcakes, and transporting juice and string cheese, he was being rushed to a hospital.

And while we were singing the birthday song at preschool and cheering for my sweet little Bug, he was being pronounced dead.

While the rest of the world kept spinning, their entire world fell apart.

And I can't stop thinking about it!

I'm beside myself upset about the tragedy of it all.

The horror of it. The injustice of it. The finality of it.

I don't know what to do!

While I love their daughters with all of my heart, I don't want to intrude. I don't want to violate their privacy in any way, so I mourn from afar, knowing that they are a very highly regarded family who will be embraced by many, many loved ones.

But I hate this feeling of helplessness!

I have a knot in my throat, and a pit in my stomach, and I'm angry that people are expected to endure things like this.

When my mom died, I remember being angry at people for going about their day. How could they walk into a store and buy milk, or pop open a can of soda and take a swig, when my mom wasn't here anymore?

How can life go on for everyone else, when other lives are so tragically and senselessly ripped apart?

It makes me mad!

It makes me mad that this family will be forced to endure a grief so deep and so heavy that it will feel impossible. I'm angry that these darling girls will have a void in their lives forever. I'm sad that their mother will feel the weight of the world on her shoulders, and the ache of this loss in her heart for the rest of her earthly life.

I can't believe that humans are expected to endure something this painful.

And because their loss is so infinitely deep, there's nothing anyone can do. There's nothing anyone can say.

So I watch my five year old play with her new birthday toys, and I imagine the grief, shock, and confusion that is happening just a few streets over, and I pray more sincerely than I have prayed in a very long time, that this family will be alright.

That they will find some comfort, somehow, somewhere. That there will be enough peace, enough faith, enough hope to cope with the crushing grief that is sure to come.

I plan a meal to take to the funeral, and continue wondering how it is, that tragedies like this happen. How it is, that we are all supposed to just keep trudging on through life. How they are supposed to keep breathing, when there is one less family member at home than there should be.

Daring Greatly

2011-01-30T11:38:00.000-08:00

It is not the critic who counts;

Not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles,

Or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,

Whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;

Who strives valiantly;

Who errs,

Who comes short again and again,

Because there is no effort without error and shortcoming;

But who does actually strive to do the deeds;

Who knows great enthusiasms,

The great devotions;

Who spends himself in a worthy cause;

Who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement,

And who at the worst,

If he fails,

At least fails while daring greatly,

So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls

Who neither know victory nor defeat.

-Theodore Roosevelt

Enjoying the Journey

2011-01-29T00:12:00.000-08:00

Life is so weird sometimes.

It's always changing, and I didn't anticipate that as a kid. "When I grow up" was a destination.

It's weird that it took so long for me to realize that life will always be a journey.

I think I'm finally learning to enjoy the ride.

Bumps and all.

Sledding, dinners, and drama

2011-01-21T16:23:00.000-08:00

January usually equals depression for me.

Putting away the Christmas stuff is super un-fun, and then when the dreaded job is over, the house feels cold and empty.

The bare trees, gray skyline, and dead grass outside don't exactly conjure cheer, and just when you're thinkin' you'll leave it all behind for a day of skiing, the credit card bills from December's shopping spree start rolling in.

Maybe we shouldn't blow a couple hundred dollars on skiing...

And while I would rather be skiing than blogging right now, I'm happy to report that in spite of the cold and gloom outside, January hasn't been all that bad!

We've had a surprisingly fun month!

Instead of skiing, we opted for the more economical sledding, and everyone had a ball:

(I'd like to point out that the DSi which showed up on January's credit card statement was worth its weight in gold while driving to Tahoe & back)!

In addition to having snow-much-fun on the week-ends, January also means that the kids are back in school!

And while I do complain way too much about working in classrooms, sometimes I spend my classroom time productively; last week I selected Olivia's future husband for her.

Isn't he the cutest kid ever? His personality is even cuter! Plus, a major perk is that Bug already likes him!

Another benefit of January is that the girls are back in "tastics,"

and Gager is back in jujitsu,

and there seems to be less time in the day for the wee Childs to fight with each other.

Friday nights usually mean that one or more kids is sleeping over,

and even though it has been freezing cold this winter, Jon and I have been hitting the bike trail on his days off...

Yep, January has been surprisingly okay so far!

And that's not all! The fam got together on the 14th for Ivy's "ancestor dinner," and it was a very cute event!

The kids sang a few songs,

and then had dinner with their families, showing off their artwork after that.

Here is Ivy with her teacher, Mrs. Jones,

And here's a shot of the whole crew!

Ivy was thrilled to have Jim & Mir, Jeff, great-aunt Donna, grandpa, and Judi, come along!

I was happy for her, too. She's such an awesome little girl, she deserves every bit of the love and attention that came her way that night!

Yep, aside from the "drama" at the beginning of the month, January of 2011 has been A-okay.

And because the incident is still unresolved for me, I keep feeling the need to discuss it. But Jon wants me to put it to rest, and really, I respect Jon more than I resent the people who offended me.

I won't lie! I am still feeling really hurt, confused, and blind-sighted, and it would have been nice to have a hundred people tell me I'm right.

But it's time to be a grown-up and learn how to be okay with just my own opinion.

My opinion is that I was a victim of someone's exaggerating, and a few people's gossip.

So I guess that makes me just like every other human being alive.

And I can handle it! From now on, I'll handle it like a grown-up.

Live and learn

2011-01-14T22:34:00.000-08:00

I think I've always been a slow-learner, and I know I was a late bloomer, but ya know what?

Even though it takes me longer to get there...

I do eventually get there!

My day started out like this:

(Yep, that is BLACK PAINT in the hands of those 4-year-olds),

and then it continued on with a whole bunch of inconvenient annoyances strewn throughout the middle of it,

while finally concluding with this:

The funny thing is, I had to walk past this

on my way to this

and suddenly, it hit me!

Jon likes a clean house as much as I do. But apparently some things are more important than a clean house...

By George, I think he's onto something!

I kept right on walking, all the way to the top of my stairs, and straight into my bathroom.

And instead of this:

My day ended like this:

And we're all still alive to tell the story.

Yep. I went to bed with dishes in my sink, and somehow the world did not come to an end.

I'm kind of enjoying my new-found "letting go."

Jon kind of isn't...

Christmas 2010

2011-01-09T21:47:00.000-08:00

The holidays of 2010 were a blur (kinda like every other year), but we had a great season and I'm happy to finally be bloggin' about it!

Despite having to deal with a dreadful cold during the two weeks prior to Christmas, and in spite of my constant complaining throughout the entire month of December (Christmas Day was Jon's third day-off that month), we somehow ended up having a great holiday, enjoying the perfect mix of family, friends, and celebrating!

It was no small task preparing for the biggest holiday of the year, but now that it's over, I can look back and be thankful that it was all worth it; we ended up having a very Merry Christmas!

School ended on the 23rd of December, and each of the three kids' classes had holiday parties, but I slept through all of them trying to get over my horrendous cold! I caught the very end of Olivia's, just in time to snap a few pictures of the fun I missed...

We then had a week to get ready for Christmas, and with the kids out of school and Jon working every, single, day, I was not as jolly as I should have been!

Between shopping, cleaning, Christmas parties, and all the other millions of holiday events I forced myself to trudge through... I was wiped out. Poor Jon was the target of my mood more than once, as I griped about having single-handedly pulled off Christmas completely ALONE this year. I mean, how dare he go out and have fun all day at work without me?

I know, I'm a brat! I realize that. And I recognize Jon's efforts in always doing whatever it takes to support our family, but come on! Being the mom is sucky sometimes! And it continues to baffle me as to why I'm the only mom who ever says that...

ANYWAY, the kids thoroughly enjoyed their time off from school!

They had some play time,
Some lazy time,

And even spent some time playing with their good buddies (Cole and Olivia) from Utah!

Before we knew it, Christmas Eve was here, and they were begging me to let them open a present before bed!

Gage opened his robe, and Ivy opened a Zhu zhu pet, but Buggy missed out! She had fallen asleep on Jon during my "Christmas is not just about presents, it's about the birth of our Savior" routine, so we let her rest up for the big day ahead!

She is only four. And when you're four, Christmas kind of is just about presents....

After the other kids finally drifted off, we stuffed the stockings, placed the Santa gifts by the tree, and finally went to bed around 2.

By some miracle, the kids let me sleep until 7:30 on Christmas morning! Jon had instructed them not to wake us up until the sun was out. He straggled out of bed at 7:20, looked out the window to see dark, gray skies, and glanced downstairs to see all three kids plopped in front of the tree, patiently waiting for the sun to come out!

Jon woke me up, called my dad, and the frenzy began!

Despite my plan to not spoil the kids this year, I think they may have been spoiled.

But isn't that the best part about Christmas morning with little kids?

After presents, my dad bar-b-qued the famous "pickled pork chops" that have been a Lema family tradition on Christmas morning for longer than I have been alive.

You put the chops in a jar of vinegar, garlic, and pickling spices,

and you let the disgusting concoction fester in the fridge for four or five days,

and then you grill 'em.

Yum.

That was sarcastic. They stink to high heaven, and I won't go anywhere near them, but Jon, my dad, and Ivy all think they are marvelous!

I ate frosted Mini Wheats, Gage had Cocoa Krispies, and Bug had chocolate milk... which we all washed down with a piece of Sees Candy or two.

We spent the rest of the morning playing with toys and getting ready for our family dinner at 2. Friends & fam started arriving around Noon, and at 2:30, we sat down to enjoy our ham and turkey Christmas dinner together!

Ya know what? It was pretty great! I do enjoy holidays when we're surrounded by friends and family!

After dinner, Ivy and Bug "performed" The Nutcracker in front of a very enthusiastic audience,

while the rest of the crew played Dummy Rummy, (and a few other games into the night)!

It really was a very Merry Christmas this year!

Small bark, big bite

2011-01-06T17:41:00.001-08:00

Today was a better day.

I'm still upset about my drama yesterday, but the more I've thought about things, the more okay I am with how it all went down.

All of us have to deal with conflicts in life; it's an inevitable reality of sharing the planet with other human beings, all of whom are flawed. I have never pretended to be flawless.

And most of the time, I'm quick to apologize. If I've harmed someone or wronged them in any way, I genuinely feel bad about it and want to correct things.

I believe that I am an ethical, reasonable, compassionate person, and I can sincerely say that I go about life with a universal feeling of good will.

I don't wish harm on anyone. Ever.

So when I am attacked in a manner that I perceive to be unprovoked, unjustified, and malicious in nature, I respond with blatant honesty about how I'm feeling.

Usually the person doesn't speak to me again for awhile, and I admit that I have never been nominated for a popularity contest.

And maybe I am wrong.

Maybe I am supposed to just avoid the issue, and pretend that everything's fine, and smile at the person the next time I see them, while muttering under my breath about how much they suck as they walk away.

But I don't wanna do that.

Life is too short to play those kinds of games.

If I don't like you, I won't pretend that I do. While I try to be polite to everyone, I do not express insincere affections.

And if you've injured me in some way, you're not gonna get a passive smile outa me. You're gonna get an earful.

It doesn't make me very popular.

But that's okay. Because even though it is traumatic when I'm embroiled in conflict, I'm usually okay with whatever the outcome happens to be, as long as I've justifiably stood up for myself.

Because I'm a pretty shy person; sometimes even reclusive.

I prefer to blend into the background, and quietly go about my business while allowing others to do the same.

I very rarely bark.

But if you attack me without cause, I'm gonna bite back.

And that's what I mean when I say that being real about who I am and where I'm at- without any concern for whether you still "like" me at the end of it- feels good.

I'm sad that there is conflict,

but I feel good about being real.

Breaking the "nice girl" status quo still feels good.

Jon has been calling me a brat for 14 and a half years, and today I wear the label proudly.

Witchy Woman

2011-01-05T20:55:00.000-08:00

What a weird day.

Is it just me, or are women generally more difficult to get along with than men?

Men seem to play it straight most of the time, while many women play this passive-aggressive-manipulating game as they stumble through life.

I mean, we women can't be seen in an unpleasing light, so instead of saying, "You really irritate the crap out of me, and here's why,"

we do this whole dance of,

"I'm gonna tell you how much you suck, in a really sweet, confusing way, and I'm gonna smile the whole time, and tell you that I'm just worried about you, and I might even ask if there's anything I can do to help you after I'm done passive-aggressively insulting you."

Yep, I had an unpleasant encounter today.

And I admit that I have been guilty of over-reacting at times, and today may have been one of those days, but I can tell you this.

I am going to bed tonight knowing that I am not one of those women. I addressed the people who offended me today in a very clear, direct manner, and there is no confusion about where I stand.

Apparently I have become a Witchy Woman, and ya know what?

It feels good.

A new year

2010-12-31T11:11:00.001-08:00

Unbelievably, we are somehow at the end of another year again already! As we wave good-bye to 2010 and begin anticipating 2011, I find myself in a weird place!

Normally, I am all about making New Year's Resolutions; I had a two or three year streak of success, where I was actually able to stick to my resolutions, and thus enjoy the rewarding feelings that come with making positive changes in my life.

But last year, I failed miserably!

My resolution last year was to have regular, once-a-week "family nights," where we all sat down together to plan the upcoming week, talk about issues facing our fam right now, play games, and basically just stay connected.

It didn't happen.

We sat down for a few, and when we did, the kids absolutely loved it! I had to endure some eye-rolls from Jon, but the kid's excitement far out-weighed his discontent. I honestly don't know why I had such a hard time making it stick! We just never got into a groove; I would forget, the kids would forget, and before I knew it a month had passed!

So, I'm not making a resolution this year, because I still need to work on last year's! I'm going to try to plan a little better this year by actually penciling it in on my calendar, and hopefully we'll be able to make it a reality.

And who knows if it will really happen or not? I hope that we do succeed this year, because I think it will be a positive thing for our family.

But here's the weird part!

My normally Type A, perfectionistic, trying-to-get-it-all-done, personality has mellowed a bit lately. Maybe I finally hit the realization that I simply can't get it all done, or maybe I am just getting old, but I realized that something has changed for me when I began thinking about 2011.

In the past, the New Year has always been a time of reflection and introspection for me. I've always tried to set goals, and make changes, and figure out how to make life better. Since becoming a mother, my theme has seemed to be about finding "balance." I always start the New Year vowing to achieve more balance in my life. Getting more sleep, spending my time more meaningfully, eating better, exercising more, keeping my house more organized...

But this year, I have finally realized that imbalance is just fine!

I'll never be able to "get it all done," I'll never feel like I'm "on top of everything" and that it's all under control. That's the nature of life with kids!

And I'm finally okay with it.

This year for me will be about letting go.

Letting go of the need to impress people. Letting go of the need to be liked. Letting go of the idea that if the house isn't spotless, I'm a failure, and that if I don't have people lining up to hang out with me, I'm a loser. Letting go of the fears that hold me back!

Of course I will still set goals, and it's sort of in my nature to be busy all the time, but I think it will be a much easier existence if I can learn to roll with the punches, and just take life as it comes.

'Cause ya know what? I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and dog-gone-it, people like me!

Happy New Year

to each and every person

who stumbles across this blog.

I'm the mom

2010-12-19T00:02:00.000-08:00

I am WAY too grumpy to be posting. I should have learned a long time ago that these late-night, exhausted, overwhelmed, grumpy posts are just never good.

I should just go to bed.

But I don't wanna go to bed!

Because then another day will start. And everyone will be hungry, and they'll make messes all over the place, and the laundry will pile up, and there will be noise. Lots of noise. And not the good kind, like Mika. It will be the bad kind, like two sisters screaming their heads off at each other.

And no matter how many times I have vowed to stop screaming, I still do it. Pretty much every day. I actually scream at them to stop screaming at each other.

I just don't understand why everything has to be so hard all the time! I mean, it seems like life in general requires an INSANE amount of work. all. the. time.

And don't get me wrong. I love this little family of mine. I truly do. Jon is a stud, and most of the time I feel totally undeserving of all the love and loyalty he has always showered on me. But then sometimes, I wonder why he doesn't notice that the house is clean 85% of the time. He seems to comment on the days that I've been hopelessly out-numbered, with, "Wow. What happened here?"

I'll TELL YOU what happened here.

THREE KIDS happened here.

The things that used to take me 1 hour now take me 5.

And should it really be considered a luxury to hop on your bike and leave it all behind for a few hours on a bike trail?

NO.

But it IS!

Hopping on my bike is now impossible, because we bought a giant house and my husband works all the time to pay for it, and I am tethered to these three little people who seem to constantly need me. Even when they are in school, I am usually working in one of their classrooms, or shopping for food, or cleaning crap up, or getting ready for some project that I should have said "No" to, but was unable to form the word when I should have.

I am baffled by moms who talk about "me time."

WHAT IS THAT?

And does it last for more than 5 minutes? 'Cause I want "in" on this little "me time" secret.

And I know that I'm not supposed to be complaining. I know that I have a very privileged existence, with three great kids who I love infinitely, and a devoted husband, and all the comforts of life, and deep down, I am content. I really am.

It's just that I am tired. ALL THE TIME. I have guilt that I'm not doing enough, and I have guilt that I'm doing too much.

And it just seems like being the mom is really, really hard sometimes.

December

2010-12-14T09:21:00.000-08:00

Every year, I seem to boycott blogging in December... there's just not enough time to get everything done, so the blog gets neglected.

I'm pretty sure this will be my one and only post for the month!

Our biggest news since my last post is that

Jon quit his job!

He's been unhappy with CVS and all their "corporate" decrees for quite some time, so when he stumbled on an opportunity to leave the retail world behind forever, he took it!

He will now be working as a staff pharmacist at a long-term-care facility, and his first day is tomorrow.

He's super excited, and I'm really happy for him, but I have to admit that I'm a little nervous about the change, and how it will ultimately affect the bottom line of the household...

I'm also a little sad to say good-bye to all of his CVS co-workers, many of whom are now real friends! We went out last month for Jon's birthday, and now I'm totally bummed when I look at the pictures!

I don't know how to make new friends! Who will we hang out with now?

I guess I'm too busy to hang out anyway...

I've never been big on change, and Jon is eagerly and excitedly jumping into the next phase of life! He never wanted to stay in retail, and now he's graduating to bigger and better opportunities.

Okay, I'm happy for him.

It's all good...

The rest of the month has been all about shopping, cleaning, decorating, trying to squeeze in a work-out here & there, cooking (in a vain attempt to keep our "eating out" bill as small as possible during this month of marathon spending), and keeping up with all the kid's activities!

Gage's class went on a field trip on December 8th,

Ivy's class went to the Nutcracker on the 9th,

And Bug's little preschool class seems to be keeping us busy, too! I dragged Jon with me to work the preschool shift together this month... and, yeah, it was pretty fun!

I think it's important for Jon to get a dose of my reality every now & then!

WHEW, it's been a busy month so far! All three kids' classes have "holiday" parties coming up this Friday, and then, AHHHHHH, only a week left until Christmas!

Througout all the chaos (which seems to have been going strong since Black Friday), I've been trying to remind the kids that Christmas is really about celebrating the birth of Jesus.

I've been playing Christmas hymns in the house, and explaining that gifts were brought to the baby Jesus, and that is where the tradition of exchanging gifts on Christmas began. We read the first and second chapters in Matthew about the wise men, and the star, and the birth of the Savior.

I've been telling the kids that we're supposed to be happy about shopping for presents, and spoiling our loved ones, and that the holiday season is about reflecting on the things that matter most in life.

Then I do the exact opposite of everything I've said, and continue running around like a chicken with my head cut off, focusing on all the little things, and getting lost in the craziness!

I think they might be hearing a little bit of the preaching, however, because we're sitting in church last Sunday, and Gage whispers to me, "Mom, can we just be "home-churched" from now on?"

Nice! He's taking the idea of "home-school" (which he violently opposes, by the way) and applying it to church!

Wow! Should I be horrified that my discussing "Jesus" at home is so rare that he thinks he's been exposed to "home-church," or should I just be happy that my kid is thinkin'?

Who knows? No time to worry about that anyway; I'm off to start my Christmas cards...

Merry Christmas Everyone!

I hope you're all enjoying the magic and joy of the season.

Coastal Redwood Vacation

2010-11-26T17:02:00.000-08:00

My oldest brother and his wife moved to Crescent City 5 years ago, and ever since our very first visit in 2007, we've been huge admirers (and repeat guests) of the City by the Sea!

It doesn't seem to matter how many times I go up there! I don't think I will ever tire of that crisp, clean, ocean air, the serene blankets of clover and fern softly covering the forest floors, or the breathtaking treeline on the horizon which descends gradually until it meets the ocean.

It's amazing! It's awe-inspiring! It's magnificent and tranquil and captivating...

It's nature at its very best!

I LOVE CRESCENT CITY!

We snuck away for a visit right before Thanksgiving, and as usual, our 4 days were just not enough.

I want to go back already!

The weather was a bit damp this trip, but we were still able to fit in our favorite Crescent City activities.

Hiking through the redwood forests (this time on Boy Scout Trail),

tidepooling at Pebble Beach,

dining at the harbor while watching the sea lions,

and strolling the beaches while the kids chased waves and climbed every rock in their path.

Can I just say that we all thoroughly enjoy the endless, "free" entertainment that the outdoors of the Northern California coast provide? I feel so lucky to have such generous and hospitable family living in one of my favorite vacation destinations on Earth!

I love it there.

This visit to Crescent City was also the very first time we toured the lighthouse, and it was SUPER COOL!

The tour included a full walk throughout the interior of the lighthouse, from the basement to the light tower, and we learned about the many historical highlights, and heard a few tales about the spirits who are said to still inhabit the house... (I LOVED it)!

The lighthouse tour was awesome, and definitely one of the highlights of the trip.

Not "the" highlight you say?

Oh no.

THE highlight was definitely the last day of our vacation, when I surprised Jon with an overnight cabin-for-two get-away, perched on the edge of a redwood forest, overlooking the Pacific Ocean.

I hadn't done much for him on his actual birthday (November 11), so it was a fun belated birthday surprise!

Chris and Donna volunteered to keep the kids at their house while Jon and I snuck away for a night.

I had quietly packed Jon's overnight bag and pillow, and snuck it out to the truck, before we headed out "sight-seeing" for the day! I pretended to want to "check out" the cabin, while Chris and Donna drove off with all three of our kids in their Jeep!

Once inside, I surprised Jon with the plan!

The cabin was all ours for the next 24 hours!

He was pretty excited (yay!), and I was too. I'd actually pulled off a surprise, and it was a SUPER, FAT, FUN surprise!

YAY!!!

Our cozy little cabin came with a wall stove for heat, a fully stocked kitchen & bathroom, and a private hot tub on the deck.

And are ya ready for the view from our deck?

TA-DA!

Yep, it was pretty much SPECTACULAR!

Right down to the Stellars Jay who seemed intrigued with our hot tubbing bliss!

Yep, it was a pretty great get-away, and I did NOT want to leave!

We enjoyed breakfast by the shore on our last morning there, before returning back to Chris & Donna's to thank them profusely for overnight babysitting (is that the best birthday present EVER, or what)?

Yeah, it was pretty much the best family vacation we've had in awhile!

Thanks Chris & Donna, for hosting us, and for watching our kids, and for sharing the little bit of heaven on Earth with us that you call "home."

We love Crescent City!